Healing
by WolfPackLover13
Summary: To HEAL is to make sound or whole, to cause an undesirable condition to be overcome, to restore to original purity or integrity. Jacob and Leah both need to heal. How do they do it together and how does is change them forever?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**LeahPOV**

I looked at Jake from afar. It was hard to believe that happy-go-lucky Jake was so depressed. I mean, it wasn't like him and the leech-lover were ever together. He may have loved her and wanted puppies, but oh no, she was too busy becoming a necrophilliac.

He sighed heavily and hunched his shoulders. Unrequited love is a bitch. I should know, more so than anyone else in the pack. I knew his pain, I shared it. Speaking of pain, mine was getting better, I guess. I'm not pining for Sam anymore but I hate that I felt so heartbroken while he felt nothing but love, it just wasn't fair.

"Leah?" Jake said. I opened my eyes to see him standing in front of me, he must have moved whilst I was lost in the past.

"Hey..." I trailed off awkwardly.

"You spying on me?" he asked seriously. Shrugging I stepped away from him. I swear that boy has no sense of personal space.

"Sam sent me to check on you." Wrong thing to say.

He snorted without humor. "I want to be alone."

I rolled my eyes. "Well no shit Sherlock. However, our oh so caring leader says you've got patrol at dawn."

He closed his eyes and half-turned away. "You're not helping yourself by remembering her..." I told him, probably being far too abrupt, but that's me, Little Miss Sensitive.

His eyes snapped open, and he spun back to face me. Staring into his dark eyes, I was reminded of my own after the Emily incident; they were hurt, and pissed.

"Go away Leah." His voice was barely more than a snarl.

I smirked humorlessly, trying to intimidate a female werewolf who seemed to be on constant PMS? Futile.

"Or what?" I said lifting my head up and staring him out. Showing him that I was not afraid.

"Leah, don't test me I'm not in my right mind." He warned, shaking, he obviously was trying not to fight as well as trying not to phase. That's when I blew up. Thinks he's so superior; fighting his natural instincts, acting like he's the only one who has experienced pain.

"Kiss my ass, Jacob. Stop acting like you're the only one who's been hurt. Suck it up and move on! Stop acting like a whiny little bitch!" I yelled pushing him in the chest.

He stumbled back for a mere second, not expecting the push, before stepping closer, getting right in my face.

"So I should stop acting like you? Because that's how you act all the time. We're all sick of your whining how bout you get over Sam and move on. _He_ obviously has."

I almost phased right then and there, I was so angry. All I could think of was how Sam had moved on and how happy he was and how no matter how hard I tried I couldn't move on, I couldn't be happy. I shook my head, and bolted out of there, shaking like a leaf but staying human. I didn't want the pack to hear me right now.

By the time I stopped running my feet were screaming in pain, there are definitely disadvantages to running around forests barefoot. I ran as far up the mountain I could before I realized that no matter how far I ran, the pain would still be there, following me, holding me, imprisoning me.

I screamed as loud as I could, hearing it echo across the forest. I was so trapped by my heartbreak, trapped by what I was. I was just stuck here, forever. No matter what would happen, I would be stuck here, confined by duty, nostalgia and family.

My knees buckled and I wept. For the first time in a long while, I simply sat and cried. Even when Sam imprinted, I didn't weep, I got angry. This pain was different, I just wanted to die as I curled up in a ball and closed my eyes, hoping sleep would ease the pain, help me forget it if only for a couple of hours.

**JacobPOV**

When the sun rose I pulled myself out of my tiny bed and went on border patrol. I knew I wasn't ready for this but Sam had ordered it, and what Sam wants, Sam gets. I can understand his reasoning; if I could get back into the swing of things I'd feel better. Even though I understand the reasoning, I disagreed with it.

When I finally phased, just inside the tree line, it seemed like everyone currently phased was in a panic. There were several thought trains, but all had an underlying mission: find Leah.

_What? Since when is she missing?_

_No one has seen her since her patrol yesterday._ Seth thought, obviously worried for his sister.

He wasn't the only one worried. Leah may not be the most predictable person, but she does not run away. It was one of her more admirable qualities. Even though she would have opportunity and motive to run, even being the fastest of us all, she never ran away from her problems. She simply sat back and took whatever life threw at her, usually with a snarky comment.

_Jake, she was supposed to talk to you yesterday. _Seth said. I could feel the others focusing on me.

My mind flashed back to our little 'talk' everything that was said. She pushed my buttons and I pushed hers, just like we always have done.

_What did you say?_ Seth growled listening to my thoughts.

The memory flashed back to me, incredibly vivid.

_So I should stop acting like you? Because that's how you act all the time. We're all sick of your whining how bout you get over Sam and move on. He obviously has. _

For the first time, the hive mind dulled, only for a few seconds, before the shock faded and anger became more prominent.

_WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?_ Seth yelled.

_She provoked me._ I yelled back.

_Dude low blow._ Paul added, with Jared agreeing. I growled at them both.

_She was trying to help you! _I couldn't tell if this came from Seth or Sam.

I realized it was Seth as his mind flashed to a conversation between her, him and Sam. Sam had asked Seth to tell me about my patrol but Leah volunteered. Reasoning that she knew what I was going through. It was true she had gone through heartbreak, worse than I had Sam had loved her back, before he imprinted; I never had that opportunity with Bella.

I thought about what she had said. _You're only hurting yourself by remembering her_. I groaned.

_See, she was trying to help you and you said that to her you're a fucking asshole Jake! _Seth growled.

Man, he's pissed I've never heard a cuss word out the kids mouth.

He was backed up by similar thoughts from Sam and Embry, who had been surprisingly quiet up until now.

I sighed heavily and made my way to where I had seen her last hoping I could track her scent.

_Oh, so now you feel guilty._ Seth growled. I couldn't help but be relieved he was on the far side of the rez, if he was any closer I have no doubt he would take a swipe at me.

I found her scent quickly, and started tracing it. It went up the mountain, far up the mountain, crisscrossing in a random fashion, as if she was unsure of where she was going, just running aimlessly. She had run for miles, yet not as a wolf...

_Human…_ Seth whined thinking of how hurt she must've been. Poor kid, he was very worried about his sister, although I knew if..._when_ she was found, they would both pretend to be oblivious to it.

Sam was the closest to me but still far behind, followed by Embry, Paul, Jared and Seth bringing up the rear. Where ever this trail led I would get there first. I ran for another 5 minutes until I saw her curled up on the ground. I phased before Seth could say anything and put my sweats on and ran to her. She was sleeping soundly, with a frown on her face, or at least, that's what I thought.

I tried to wake her but she didn't move.

"Leah" I said shaking her. No response. I put my head to heart and listened. Her heart was beating, faster than it should have been, even for a wolf. Her breath was shallow and labored.

Worried, I pulled away and picked her up, holding her limp body in my arms bridal style with her head draped over my arm, whilst her arms were swinging lifelessly swinging.

_God, what did I do?_

"What happened?" I heard Sam's voice boom from the trees. He stepped out and ran to us, still pulling his shorts on. I averted my eyes.

"I found her like this...she won't wake up." I told him honestly.

He felt her pulse. "She's alive just unconscious." He sighed in relief before glaring at me half-heartedly. Regardless of connection with Emily it was clear he still loved Leah...a lot, except now, it was more the brotherly bond shared by most of the pack. I started running back towards La Push, trying not to jolt Leah too much, but refusing to let Sam carry her. I had caused this, so I had to deal with it. I had to fix it.

Seth met us at the border, trying to take her from my arms.

"Seth let me just get her to the house ok...please." I begged him.

He glared stonily at me, in a manner creepily similar to Leah's own harsh glares, but nodded nonetheless.

We got to Sue's quickly, entering through the back garden. As soon as we walked in the door she shrieked, rushing to her daughter's side.

"What happened?"

"I just found her like this...she's unconscious." I told her, semi-truthfully, knowing she would get the abridged version later.

Sue took a deep breath. "Let's get her into her room." she said. I nodded and went to her room then laid her down carefully. All of a sudden, she looked so small, huddled on the twin sized bed. Nothing like the large personality she usually portrays.

"Give her some space for minute." Sue said looking around at the 3 large men in the room, there was no room for all of us so we walked back into the front room leaving mother and daughter in peace.

Next thing I knew I was on the ground a pain in my jaw. I looked up to see Seth shaking over me, both fists raised... "Hasn't she had enough of you bastards hurting her?" He yelled looking from me to Sam, almost hysterically.

"Seth, calm down." Sue said walking in the room soundlessly and placing a hand on his shoulder, rubbing it comfortably.

He took a deep breath as I got up, rubbing my jaw.

"I am tired..." he voice quivered almost violently causing me to raise a brow. I didn't know he could get so mad. Seth was usually such a positive personality. He took another deep breath before continuing.

"...I am tired of watching her get hurt." He shook his head sadly. "She didn't deserve it any of it... she was and still is a good person." He closed his eyes. "She used to be so happy, she laughed, and she smiled. I miss my sister and all of this took her away from me, from us, but still tried to do her part she tried to help." His voice raised as he talked.

"Seth" Sam tried to speak but Seth's glare shut him up.

"No, I'm not done yet. I quit." he said, with a note of finality.

"WHAT?" we all said in shock. Sue included.

"I _am_ done with hearing all about your happiness while I watch my sister dying inside. I am done with taking orders from the asshole that broke my sister's heart. You had to break my sister to get your happiness and that's something I cannot respect. You're a coward and I will never follow you." Seth growled. Sam growled back, trying to assert his Alpha authority.

"Hold on for a minute...everybody needs to calm down. Look the only thing that matters right now is Leah, we need to focus on her right now and deal with the other stuff later." I said trying to calm everyone down. This was not the time to be discussing this. Sue nodded approvingly, before going back to Leah.

Seth snarled at me.

"Now you want to care about her it's your fault she's in there now, Jake. Just because Bella ripped your heart out doesn't mean you can treat my sister like shit." He yelled at me pushing past, knocking me into Sam and out the door.

"Neither one of you are welcomed on my land again. Stay the fuck away from me _and_ my sister." He said before slamming the door so hard the window shattered.

I got up and dusted myself off, then looked at Sam. He didn't say anything at all, not even acknowledging me. He looked in deep thought apparently something Seth said had got him thinking. I sighed and walked home.


	2. Chapter 2

******I was anxious to put up this story I forgot to give you guys some background. So if it isn't obvious already this takes place post eclipse. BD has not happened yet. I also want to thank my beta I Dont Bite-much without you this story would be nothing. And thank you to all my reviewers. I feel the love so I'll keep 'em coming. Oh and of course I don't own anything S. Meyer does duh!**

**Chapter 2**

It had been three days since the incident, three long days and I still didn't know if Leah was ok or not. Seth still refused to let Sam or me on the property. My dad told me she had finally woken up yesterday evening but she kept slipping in and out of consciousness. _Her mind doesn't want to face the pain just yet_. Was what my dad told me.

Apparently Sue had even called Bella to get Carlisle to check up on her, Sam had even given permission for him to cross the border, he was that worried. Papa Leech had inserted an IV to ensure she got some nutrition but said there was little he could actually do; it was just a waiting game now.

Waiting for her to wake up. Waiting for her to want to wake up. Waiting for her mind to gain enough strength to be able to live day to day life. Just...waiting.

Throughout this time I realized just how much she had to bear. Not only did she have the Sam thing, every time she phased she had to hear Sam's every thought about Emily, remembering how much she had lost. She was the only female wolf, so had nobody to relate to. Essentially she was classed as a freak among freaks. On top of that, Harry hadn't been gone that long. Bella may not love me, but at least I had a family to help me through it all. Leah had hardly anyone on her side. Finally my dad told me it was probable she couldn't have kids.

If it was too much for me to think about, living through it must be hell. If I was her mind I wouldn't want to face it either.

Seth had stayed true to his word. He hadn't phased or attempted to contact anyone in the pack he just stayed at home, by her side, being the person she needed right now. I wanted to apologize to him and to her, explain that I didn't mean to hurt her, I just...well whatever I was thinking at the time was wrong. I had no reason to bring up Sam when she clearly was trying to help me, distract me from all my pain. Damn it, I'm human...sort of…I make mistakes, but admittedly, that was probably the biggest one I ever made.

My father called me to the front room. I walked through from the kitchen, bottle of water in hand and sat on the couch with a sigh.

"Sue says she sent Seth to the store...you can go visit for a minute." He told me, his face an odd mixture of sadness and slyness.

My head shot up. "Really?" I asked getting up.

"Yes. Now hurry and get over there before Seth gets back."

I was halfway out the door before he finished, water abandoned on the floor. Racing over to the house I made it in record time, and ran straight in, not even bothering to knock. Sue turned from the kitchen sink smiling sadly at me before gesturing to the stairs .

"Thank you so much for letting me see her, Sue." I told her sincerely as I was running up the staircase. She smiled slightly and tuned back to the dishes. I arrived at Leah's bedroom door and took a deep breath before opening the door. I closed it behind me before turning to her. She was awake but blankly looking up to the ceiling. I quietly, yet hurriedly walked over to her and knelt on the shabby rug next to her bed. I stayed quiet for several minutes, waiting for her to acknowledge me.

"It's not your fault Jake." she finally said, still not looking at me, though her eyes flickered, as if she wanted to.

"It is." I whispered back.

Finally she turned her head and looked at me but I saw something I had never seen from her before. Resignation.

"I provoked you." She argued, albeit feebly.

"You were trying to help me." I argued back, much more convincingly. After a short staring contest I sighed.

"Leah, It didn't matter what you said I shouldn't have said what I said when I know it's a...a sore subject for you. It was completely unnecessary and cruel." I told her, shamefaced.

It was her turn to sigh. "It was that bad huh? When you found me?" She asked in a small voice. If it was anyone else other than Leah, I would have said she was timid, or afraid.

Nodding I whispered my confession "I was scared, Lee".

"I didn't want to live in the real world anymore. My dreams are so much easier...when they're good anyways." She sighed sadly, curling up on her side, facing me.

I rubbed her exposed arm slightly and was pleased when she didn't flinch at my touch.

"I'm sorry" I murmured, again.

"I'll be fine Jake, I know how to pull myself together." she smiled weakly but wryly. Oh I knew that much. And if she couldn't pull herself together, she would pretend that she had, hiding behind a smokescreen of bitchiness and snarky comments. At least for everyone else she would. She knew that I would always see the truth and I think it scared her.

"You don't have to be so strong Leah. It's ok to be weak, it's ok to cry sometimes." I told her, still rubbing her arm gently. The tears began to roll down her face at that. I knew she was trying to hold them back, like she had been doing for so many years, and I think it pained her even more that she couldn't stop them from falling any more.

"What did I do wrong? What I do to deserve this? I..." She stuttered brokenly, mere half sentences erupting sporadically.

I shook my head wildly, grabbing hers between my palms in the process, staring into her weeping eyes.

"Nothing, ok. You did nothing to deserve this...ever. That's why it hurts so much. You were a normal person. You cared about him, you loved him and her, you did things for them out of the kindness of your heart and they stepped on yours and ground it down. They took something from you, and you can't get it back. He left a mark that you'll always carry with you; he's forever in your life now and not for a good reason anymore."

She cried silently, her tears rolling down my hands.

I pulled her into my chest, holding her close and thinking of everything I was trying to convince myself of. I know I was being harsh on Sam and Emily, but neither ever apologized to my knowledge.

"But in the end you win because you'll find someone better, someone who deserves you and you'll have done it the right way. You won't step on anyone else to find your happiness and it's going to make everything worth it, I promise you that Leah. I promise." I assured her, a desperate tone to my voice as I rocked her slowly. She wept until she ran out of tears, whilst I sat there and held her.

We didn't say anything for the rest of the night. Nobody bothered us and we ended up falling asleep together, curled up close on the tiny single bed that could barely hold Leah's tall gangly frame, God only knows how we both managed to stay on it.

I woke up the next morning to a lonely bed. Rolling out of it I looked around. The room was clearly void of Leah. I rubbed my eyes and walked downstairs. Sue was in the kitchen cooking as always and Seth was watching TV, whilst glaring at me. Still no Leah.

"She's in the bathroom. She wanted to take a shower." Seth said to me sulkily, whilst Sue smirked casually.

I nodded and made my way over to the couch to sit beside him.

"Look Seth I know you're mad at me but I..."

He held up his hand to stop my incessant rambling. "I just care about her...I just don't want her to get hurt."

"I know I hurt her but I want to make it up to both her and you. Just please give me a chance. If it doesn't work out, you can hate me all you want for as long as you want, but please let me make this right." I begged. He pondered silently for several minutes.

"Seth could never hate you, he hero-worships you...right Sethy-poo?" Leah said laughingly from behind me. She walked past the couch and bumped shoulders with Seth who had shot up at the sound of her voice and was now hugging his sister tightly. I gulped slightly as I surveyed her. She looked a little thinner than before and it definitely showed that she had cried last night, her eyes were still puffy, but she was putting on a brave front for her brother. Seth grinned at her before going into the kitchen. She nodded at me with indication to follow her. I did so and we walked back to her room. I closed the door behind us as she sat on the bed.

"Thank you" she breathed quietly, avoiding my gaze. I nodded absently.

"For finding me, coming to see me, talking to me and staying with me. You've done a lot for me lately." She grinned ruefully.

"I was the reason you were like that so there's no need to thank me. I owed you." I told her coming to her side and sitting on the edge of the bed.

We stayed silent for a minute before she got up and walked to her closet. She grabbed a dress and slipped it on over her towel, I realized she was in a towel and nothing else, with her hair streaming down her back. How did it take me this long to realize it? Umm…Why is it so hot in here suddenly? She stripped off the towel letting the dress fall over her. She turned to face me and the dress flared slightly. Oh Jesus, she doesn't have any underwear on either. I felt the sweat bead along my spine.

"So I was thinking we could take a walk. I haven't seen the outside of this house in quite awhile." she grimaced.

I stood up quickly and nodded as I headed out the room; it was getting smaller and hotter every second I stayed in there.

As we walked towards the beach my hands were kind of clammy for a reason I couldn't explain. Leah stayed quiet, just looking around at the deserted beach. Eventually we came to a log and she sat down on it, breathing quite heavily. She looked tired, exhausted even, especially for such a short journey.

"Maybe this was too much for you right now, you know you were unconscious for days." I pointed out.

"I'm fine." she replied her voice was fierce but flat.

"You're tired." I accused her, sitting on the log to her right.

She shrugged. "I'm just tired of all of it. The pain, the memories, the emotions... I'm just ready to let it all go."

"Easier said than done...right?" I grinned a little, trying to make her smile.

She nodded as she looked to the ocean.

"Did you mean what you said last night?" she asked after a long silence.

"Of course I did. But I don't think I realized how true it is until I said it to someone else." I told her, being both honest and frank.

She closed her eyes. "I'm not sure where I can go from here... I know I have to get back in the swing of things but I hate that everyone is gonna think I'm weak, they're all gonna look at me differently." She grumbled.

I laughed slightly at her logic, she always had to be the tough one, protecting her reputation.

"Yeah they are gonna look at you different, but not because you had a moment of weakness. They all realized that they really do care about you, maybe even more then they like to admit. I mean it was pure chaos when you were missing. Everyone was phased, looking for you. Seth and Sam were going insane, bossing everyone around. A leech could've slipped past us and killed half of Forks and we honestly wouldn't have noticed." I chuckled, nudging her shoulder with my own.

She turned to me in shock with a grimace clear on her face as she spat the next words out.

"Really? I don't see why, I'm just a pain to everyone."

My smile disappeared as she spoke. She truly thought that no one cared about her.

"Lee, you're a part of this family just as much as the next person. We might fight and argue but in the end we all care about each other. Do you really think that if something happened to you none of us would care, none of us would be affected?" My voice rose slightly both in pitch and volume towards the end of my little rant, my anger showing in both that and my shaking, ready to phase.

"I don't know I just...sometimes I feel like I would be doing everyone else a favour if I just disappeared, if I never existed. Sometimes I wish I was with my dad so it would be easier for everyone else." She said wiping her tears away angrily, trying to control her emotion, as always, trying to be strong.

A growl escaped my lips accidentally.

"Don't ever think like that...ever ok? Seth would go into a depression and Sue wouldn't know how to live. Sam would probably let a leech kill him as well as half of the pack, and I just wouldn't know what to do... You make an impression on people, often literally." I rubbed my cheek in remembrance of past slaps and punches. "So Lee, don't you ever think that any of us could live without you. I know I can't." I said shaking my head sadly at the thought. It scared me to even think of her not being around.

She sighed and leaned in to my shoulder. "I feel so trapped..."

"It will get better. I promise." I whispered into her hair.

"You really don't know that though." She grumbled, still not moving from our almost-embrace.

I shrugged. "Well no but I have faith that it will." I said standing up and taking her hand, dragging her up with me. She laughed slightly.

"Well I hope you've got enough for the both of us."

We walked back towards the house, still linked at the hand and spent the rest of the day there with Sue and Seth. Just laughing, watching TV, and eating. After dinner I headed home realizing this was the first day in a very long time that I had spent with Leah and didn't come home with a black eye. Life is looking up.


	3. Chapter 3

**So here's chap. 3! I hope you likes it. Loving my reviews everytime my phone "pings" my day gets a little bit better.**

**And yeah, yeah I don't own anything but the lovely plot in my head. S. Meyer brought me into this world and now I can't get out! **

**Enjoy!**

**WolfPackLover13**

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**Chapter 3**

Tuning my car was on my list of shit to do today, thankfully Leah was there to help me get it all done. I peeked from under the hood to stare at her. She was cleaning off the 'junk' table and trying to put things in proper, organized places. I could hear her soft hum as she mulled over the different types of oil cans on the table.

She had a lighter spirit today. We both did. After we spilled our guts to each other yesterday, we both looked and felt lighter, almost like a heavy weight had been lifted from our shoulders. Even though I knew it was only a temporary feeling, I decided to take whatever I could get. You know what they say beggars can't be choosy, and right now I was begging for the pain to go away, just for a little while.

I sighed and turned my attention back to the engine, trying to ignore the memories of Bella and me in this car and garage. As I forced the memories away I listened to Leah's hum slowly becoming louder as I paid more attention to it. The melody wasn't anything I actually recognized but it was obvious that she knew it very well. Sounded like one of her classic rock tunes. I let the tune carry me through a few items on my list, changing the oil etc. before I helped Leah clean up the garage.

We didn't say much to each other as we worked, but it wasn't an awkward silence, instead it was blissful, something that we both enjoyed. After the garage was classed as habitable we headed to the store for both our parents, then after dropping off all the groceries we headed to the beach.

I realized my day was officially ruined when we walked past Bella and I's spot, well old spot. I winced in pain, her chocolate eyes flashing in front of mine.

"It feels like the memories are choking me." I murmured, more to myself than Leah, but she heard nonetheless. She looked over at the spot, recognition flashing in her eyes and nodded.

"They do…" She sighed. "...It got so bad for me that I wished that they just go away. That it never happened, that three years of my life would've just disappeared." She whispered looking out onto the horizon.

"Sounds like a good deal to me." I laughed darkly without humour.

"You really don't want to remember her? You wish you never met her?" she asked already knowing what the answer would be, just like I knew she really didn't want to forget. What is it I read in my last fortune cookie? Better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all.

"No, I'm glad I met her, but I wish it had turned out differently you know?" I said, my voice defeated.

I wanted to get rid of the pain and just keep all the good parts to myself but that was impossible. The good parts made me love her but my love for her was the reason why I was in pain. It was all connected.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." She said with a grimace.

"Do you wish you never met him, now I mean after all you've gone through?" I asked her, like she had, I already knew the answer, but I wanted to hear her say it.

She closed her eyes, her pain was so much more evident now, now that she was open with me, now that it had been unleashed and was impossible to restrain.

"No" she whimpered, her bottom lip trembled slightly before she caught it and took a deep breath. "That's what pisses me off the most. I still... love him, I still want those memories even though their killing me."

She ground the words out through her teeth, her fists balling up and small tremors wracking through her. I didn't feel sorry for asking the question though. When we began this thing a week ago, we decided to always be honest and never hold back. It was an unspoken yet definite agreement. We both realized if we were going to help each other through the pain and heartbreak, then we had to push each other. She took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself down.

"Come on let's go swimming." I said and dragged her into the water. She protested feebly, but still let me drag her, possibly because she wasn't in full control just yet, possibly because she needed the cold water to calm her. Whatever the reason was I was grateful for it. As soon as the water hit both of us it was like a release.

I sighed and let her go as she squealed a little when a wave caught her dress. After calming down she laid back, let her hair get wet and closed her eyes looking almost content. She looked very peaceful as she floated in the water, buffeted gently by the waves. I soon joined her and we floated in harmony for a while before she turned to me with a smile sparkling in her eyes.

"Billy's not home tonight right?" she asked with a grin dancing across her face.

I shook my head. "Gone fishing with Charlie until tomorrow."

She smiled coyly and nudged me back to the beach. "I've got an idea." She said in a sing song voice. Last time she used that voice, she ended up drunk and with a tattoo on her ankle, I ended up carting her home and explaining to Sue. It wasn't pretty. So excuse me for thinking _Uh-oh._

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I stumbled across the living room into the kitchen to grab the pizza boxes abandoned there hours previously. I managed to get to the kitchen relatively easily, but when I turned with the pizza the journey back looked so far and treacherous to boot.

_How am I going to get back over to her?_ I questioned myself as I looked over to Leah sprawled out giggling and hiccupping on my couch. I took a deep breath ignored the sudden head rush and walked like my life depended on it. I managed to get to the sofa, only knocking half of all the bottles we had managed to go through.

_Oh how did I let her talk me into this?_ I sat the box on her bare legs and grabbed a large slice of meat feast. It was flat cold but I wasn't going back to heat it up. Leah sat up and grabbed a slice for herself "It's cold" she glared at me as she inhaled the damn slice.

I rolled my eyes. "You're still eating it though" I shot back, through my own mouthful of cold pizza. She shrugged, grabbing another slice then sat the pizza box on the floor before curling up.

"Yeah it bust me the alhocol." she slurred, kicking a bottle away from her. They were all plastic since we got the cheapest thing we could buy; we had to buy a lot of it. At least that was Leah's warped reasoning. Crappy beer, when drank by the case tastes better as the night goes on.

"So what do you think, 5 cases is enough to get 2 werewolves fit shaced?" she asked still slurring. Admittedly, she had drunk quite a lot more than me.

I nodded. "I think 3 would've done the job icely..nicely, but 5 gets you totally fit shaced." I tried to mock her but ended up slurring myself.

She laughed hysterically, and then tried to stand up.

"You think?" She stumbled straight back down and into my lap still giggling. She wiggled and I flushed immediately.

"This is soooo not the way to deal with our problems." I told her, still trying to remember what had gotten us here. Crappy beer was what I concluded that thought with.

Man, I can't even remember going to get the crappy beer. You'd think carrying five cases with a giggling Leah would be memorable, totally shitfaced was definitely the correct word for what I was. For what we both were I gathered, looking at Leah who was still sat in my lap chuckling at the potted plant in the corner of the room.

"So? I'm a fur…fum…firm beleeva in you have to do it the right way…I mean the wrong way before you realize how to do it the other way…the right way" she said, her voice was almost a purr, albeit a drunken one.

Where did that thought come from? Was I just hearing it that way?

"This is the drast time I let you get me lunk." I told her, laughing. I had no idea why I was laughing but I couldn't stop doing it, how much alcohol was in the crappy-beer-that-got-less-crappy-the-more-you-drank anyhow?

She rolled her perfect brown eyes (darker than Bella's, sharper too) and tried to stand up again, this time I tried to help her by putting my hands on her waist (maybe I grabbed a little lower, I'm sure it was just the alcohol talking..or acting) to steady her.

"Hey now, don't you dare try to get fresh with me, Black" She hissed at me as soon as she was on her feet.

I rolled my eyes at her. "I was trying to make sure you didn't fall back on your ass."

Trying to get up myself, I failed and fell on my ass, she just laughed at me and I scowled back.

"Yeah, sure you were..." She stretched, the hemline on her dress going dangerously high before heading to my room.

"Where are you going?" I asked, still lying on the floor, which might I add, gave me certain _interesting_ views if I leaned this way…

She turned to me, leaning on the doorframe

"To bed…you coming?" She asked before disappearing into my room.

"First you get mad at me for grabbing your ass then you ask me to sleep with you...women are confusing." I grumbled as I finally got up of my ass and walked to my room with her.

"What?" she hissed.

"Nothing" I said back quickly with a grin on my face as I crawled into bed with her. Cuddling close, we zonked out almost immediately.

The next morning I woke up to the smell of coffee and bacon. It only took me about 2 seconds to realize that, before I jumped up and headed to the kitchen. Glancing around the living room I found it cleaner than it was before we had started drinking last night. Then I looked over to the kitchen and spotted Leah, she was in one of my few button up shirts and nothing else rubbing her leg with the other as she flipped the bacon in the skillet.

She looked breathtaking. I felt sorry for Sam having to imprint on Emily, it was like Emily wasn't great but Leah was...well Leah. I mean I could hardly keep my eyes off of her. She finally turned to me with a slight smile. Thanking the Gods that be for the fast healing which means we don't have to deal with hangovers I smiled back.

"You're finally up? Food will be ready in a few. You snore by the way." she told me before returning to watching the bacon. I sat down at the table and just stared at her legs, wondering why my shirt couldn't be her permanent outfit for the rest of eternity. Her long legs were playing tricks with my eyes, seemingly going on forever, yet drawing the eye deliciously to the high hemline. After a few minutes more, she sat the bacon and eggs in front of us both and we dug in, momentarily causing me to take my eyes off Leah's legs, which were hidden by the table anyhow.

"So..." she sighed. "...I was thinking we could get out of here today, go to Port Angeles or something?"

I nodded. "Sure" I said with a grin through a large mouthful of bacon. She finished her food soon after me and took both plates to the sink. I stole them from her and washed them myself, before giving her them to dry.

"You know you have some great legs." I blurted out as I handed her the frying pan. I almost blushed. _What the hell was I thinking? Not only did I admit to perving on her, I did it whilst handing her a potentially lethal weapon._

She looked at me in surprise then thankfully laughed it off.

"Are you trying to Mack me up Black?" She giggled, safely placing the pan on the rack.

_Had I ever heard her giggle before? When sober? Uh no_.

I shrugged. "I'm just making a comment" I told her then got back to washing the rest of the breakfast dishes. 

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R&R peeps! Thanks once again to my beta-Muah!


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **

**I know, I know I'm horrible for taking so long to update but between computer problems, a cousin's wedding (which was beautiful btw), traveling, and being promoted work I hadn't been able to sit down long enough to finish this chp. But here it is hopes you like it. Oh thanks you to all my reviewers and subscribers loves ya much Muah, Muah!**

**And of course I own nothing :(**

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**Chapter 4**

Leah's POV

As I drove down the highway to Post Angeles humming a song that had played on the radio 20 minutes ago, I couldn't help but replay to conversation Jake and I had at breakfast in my mind. It seemed so easy to have a conversation with him now; well it wasn't a verbal conversation more like a physical one. This strange connection we were starting to form was scaring me a little. I hadn't been close to anyone like this since my dad died not even my mom and Seth; I just didn't let anyone in. I was too afraid to. Yeah, I admit it, I'm afraid of letting anyone get too close but yet I had let Jake get close and close fast. He was there for me all the time even when I hadn't known I needed him to be. I couldn't believe how much had change between us in such a short time, all because of a heated exchange between us that sent me spiraling down a bottomless pit. He had pushed me 2 steps back so that I could move 5 steps forward.

I took a deep breathe as we entered Port Angeles, I could see Jake's questioning eyes as I headed towards the city and not the beach. I rolled my eyes at him as if to say if I wanted to go to a beach I would've stayed home. He chuckled a little then shrugged. _See, there's that silent conversation again_. I kept my eyes forward not really concentrating too hard, I didn't have to I'd been here too many times if you asked me. 2 years ago with Sam, once with the pack, and once with Jake not too long ago.

"You're shitting me, Lee" Jake said in disbelief as I pulled up to the tattoo parlor.

I nodded and looked forward. I needed to do this, I need to let go, black out all the pain and 'move on' as Jake had put it awhile back. I opened the car door and got out, squaring my jaw with the building, sizing it up like I was about to fight it. This was a battle of sorts, my own personal one. I took a deep breathe and opened the door, instantly hearing the buzzing sound of the needles. I waved to Troy and sat down.

"So how am I supposed to explain this one to Sue?" Jacob asked as he sat next to me.

"She won't even notice this one besides when she found out that I got my dad on my ankle she wasn't even upset." I said with sigh, thinking about my daddy. I brushed my ankle together rubbing the tattoo I had there with his name on it.

"Hey Leah what are you getting today?" Troy asked me.

"I just want to get this covered." I told him pointing to my finger. He looked at it for a second then nodded.

"Just let me get set-up ok?" He said then headed to his station.

I looked over at Jacob who was staring at my hand in shock. I knew what he was thinking. "No one ever notices…that's why we got 'em. It was our little secret." I told him as I got up and headed towards Troy, my hand closing around my right ring finger with Sam's name on the side of it. We had gotten these 2 years ago to symbolize the promises we made to each other and the love we had for each other. The promises were now broken; the love was now nothing more than a memory. This so called symbol didn't mean anything anymore, so it was time for it to go.

I unwraps the bandage from my finger knowing it had already healed as I sat down on the swing. Jake had driven us to a park since I refused to go to the beach again. He stayed quiet during our time in the tattoo parlor only squeezing my hand a little when Troy starting blacking out Sam's name because he knew I wanted him to help me through it. I stared down at the black band on my finger only a small portion left unfilled, the outline of the wolf I wanted. It was weird because even though I couldn't see Sam's name I still knew it was there and I knew it would always be apart of me, just like Sam was. I was branded with his name, his broken promises, and his empty love. I gritted my teeth. _How can I ever move on when he's such apart of me? _I covered my face and groaned feeling Jacob's hand on mine instantly.

"Don't hide your pretty face from me." He smiled a little.

I stared at him for a second or two, long enough for my heart to hammer into my chest, and then shrugged. "You know I never told you why I reacted the way I did that day" I whispered.

His expressions soften as it always did when I brought up that day, the day that started it all for us. I had no doubt in my mind how remorseful he felt about the things he said to me. He had apologized countless times but he never needed to I could see the regret in his eyes.

"I want to move on, I want the pain to go away but what happened, it ruined me because I'll never be comfortable, I'll never be innocent again, I'll never love wholehearted because I know what it feels like to have your heart ripped out and I'll always expect it." I said through my teeth. I looked down at my hand and took a deep breath to steady it. "I got so mad because I thought about how Sam and Emily get to live their lives without fear or pain and I'll never get that and why you know. Why should they get to go through life without worry, I can't? Why it is that life was so unkind to me while it gave them everything? Why did I have to be broken for them to have their perfect lives? Forget fair and unfair, it wrong, Jake. What happened to me was wrong." I said looking up at him. He nodded carefully; somehow I knew he was probably thinking the same thing about him and Bella. "It just sucks because I thought that if I got over the pain I would be ok, but that's not good enough anymore. I'll always remember it, I'll always feel it some where deep inside, and it's permanent." I said looking up trying not to cry, I had done enough of that around Jacob lately.

"I never thought about it that way." Jacob sighed. I swung myself over to him and placed a hand on his leg knowing he needed me at the moment. We stayed quiet swinging slightly as we stared at each other, our hands grazing each others as the night grew on.

"You know…" I sighed breaking the silence first. "Last night wasn't the right way to get over this but I think today was or at least it's a step in the right direction." I said with a small smile.

He chuckled softly. "Yeah well I'm up for anything that it doesn't involve me getting drunk." he laughed. I laughed too; the sadness in the air seemed to evaporate instantly.

I rolled my eyes. "Oh please you know you had fun maybe too much fun. Don't think I forgot about you trying to feel me up." I told him, teasingly.

"I was trying to help you up." He argued.

I laughed and got up and walked back to the car. I could feel him watching as he followed me. I got in the car and started it up. "I wasn't talking about then I was talking about you coping a feel when you thought I was sleeping." I told him laughing. His jaw dropped and his brows furrowed like he was trying to remember feeling me up in his sleep. It brought heat to my face.

"I didn't…I- I mean I didn't mean to do-" He stumbled over his words, his cheeks completely red now.

"I'm kidding Jake, damn. Do you think you would actually feel me up?" I asked. I was joking but by the look on his face he thought I was serious. He tilted his head slightly as if to say _yeah I would_. My breathing hitched slightly and the stupid car swerved. I focused myself and grumbled making up an excuse about seeing a squirrel as I shook my head ignoring the feelings building up inside me.

**Jacob's POV**

Another week had past by, so I hear, for me time wasn't much of a factor I just lived in the now. Leah seemed to be the same way. I stopped tinkering with dad's radio to hear my heart go wild at the mere thought of Leah. She was sinking her nails deep in me, so much that it didn't feel right if I didn't see her within the first hour of waking up. Our attachment only grew stronger as the days wore on. I didn't know how it happened it just did and it helped me get over my pain, it helped me wake up in the morning, go to sleep at night, and get through the stuff in between. She was my healing and I was hers. I managed to get my mind back into the broken radio when my dad rolled in to the table. He sighed heavily a couple times before I got nosey, knowing that's what he wanted anyways.

"What's wrong ole man?" I laughed as I made my way to him, placing the radio on the table next to the mail he was going through.

He looked up with sad eyes, and then he handed me an envelope. I took it instantly feeling the expensive paper in my rough hands, turning it over reading the "to" and "from" sections quickly. My heart jumped and I looked at my dad for help, _I needed help_. I hadn't dealt with my Bella problems fully and I had been so consumed in Leah lately Bella had been all but forgotten. My dad shrugged slightly and waited for me to say something or do something. I didn't know what to do. _Read it, Jake!_ I told myself as I took a deep breath and turned it back around opening it. I pulled it out; a smaller piece of paper was on top. The paper inside felt expensive, it felt weird in my hands. The note wasn't from her but from him. _Her Leech_. My teeth were grinding before I read the first line. I read his note, that stupid fucking note. _That smug bastard, I should..._

"Jake" My dad said knocking me out my rage temporally.

"Yeah" I said still focusing on the paper until I finished it.

"Don't break the table, son. It's the only one we've got." He told me.

I looked down at my hand to see the dent it was causing in our frill table. I released my hand, got up, and bolted for the door. I thought if I got outside I would feel better but I didn't, I couldn't. I looked at the letter he wrote and the invitation to her wedding enclosed, they both reeked of him, and nothing of her. Bella, my Bella was no where in this. Hell the stamp didn't even look like her. She wasn't one for fancy things; she was simple, easy, but complicated in a good way. She wasn't my Bella anymore. She was his now.

When I opened my eyes long enough to see where I was going I realized I was already here, at the cliffs, my place of solace. The only place I was able to let my mind go there, to Bella. To dwell on the "what if's", the "what could've been". This was the only place my pain was able to roam freely getting me back for all the times I locked it away. It consumed me, the hatred, the fear, the emptiness, the fact that I had lost her to someone who wasn't even alive. How could she choose… I felt the tremor rock through me but I contained it. Last thing I need was the pack to hear me rot in my own pain.

"Jake" I heard Leah say from behind me.

I sighed. I felt her coming before I heard her, that's how deep I was in with her. That's how close we had gotten in these past few weeks. I knew every breath, every step, every thought she would make probably better than I knew my own. I felt her sit next to me, but didn't take my eyes off the invitation. I knew if I did I would get distracted and I wanted to deal with this pain right now. I wanted her out of my system. My new life, my new path did not include her. Somehow the women next to me had taken up so much space in my heart and mind that there wasn't much room for Bella anymore and the longer I fought those facts the more it would hurt. Leah stayed with me, like I knew she would, not talking just waiting for me to get my thoughts around it all. I need to realize that it happened, yeah it sucked but I needed to move on. I needed to…

"Let go" she whispered in my ear placing her hand on my shoulder giving me some of her strength.

I closed my eyes and without hesitation I did. The invite blow out of my hands and Bella's eyes slowly disappear from my thoughts. The sound of her voice no longer played in my head, her strawberry scent was no longer consuming my senses. I wasn't cured of course I knew that. I still loved her in a way but I had come to terms that she didn't want me, and we'd never be together. That pain, that stabbing feeling I kept getting in my heart was gone.

I turned to Leah when I heard her sniffle, seeing small tears stream down her face as she looked away from me. I had never seen Leah cry as much as I had in these last weeks, she broke down for me and only me which showed that she trusted me. Her trust in me showed me that she was better and I had to think that it had something to do with me because I was better now because of her. We were healing each other just by being in each others presence.

As I reached out for her face, moving the stray hairs that blocked her from my view, I knew I was moving too fast, acting on feelings I hadn't quite recognized yet, but it didn't matter anymore. I didn't care that I wasn't completely over Bella or that she was in love with Sam I just want to feel her. Touch her in every way I could. I pulled her lips to mine and they met with excitement and aggression. I probably kissed her too hard, but she kissed me back even harder. Her fingers laced into my hair, scraping at my scalp, pulling me closer, but still not close enough. I sunk my teeth in her lip as I pulled away but she just pulled me back to her, into her, she wasn't done and I was glad for it. My hands moved from under her chin, grazing down her shoulder and arms, down to waist, digging in there slightly. She pulled away this time her push was gentle yet firm. I opened my eyes to see her reaction. I knew how I felt about her but if she felt the same was I couldn't prove yet, until now I guess. I thought maybe I would get slapped or kicked in the balls or maybe she would just run but the small sparkle in her eyes gave me the answer I wanted. She felt the same way too even though I wasn't sure what the feeling was quite yet. Her hand ran down my arm and into my hand as she stood up urging me to stand with her. She gave me a small smile and walked towards the forest. I followed of course then again I would probably follow her anywhere.

She leaned against a tree and look up towards the roof of the forest I came up placing my legs between hers wrapping my hands around her waist she sighed and so did I. I couldn't help the feeling of regret that starting to spread through my mind. _Why hadn't I done this earlier?_ My skin flickered to her touch making parts of me come alive in ways I didn't really understand yet. I was attracted to her, who wasn't, but this was more than attraction. It was want and need rolled up in a blanket with other confusing feelings. I lowered her chin so that her eyes would meet mine. Her face was peaceful she wasn't over thinking this, neither was I.

I just acted on instincts as I brought her face and body to mine, kissing her passionately as my hand roamed across her torso. I didn't even hesitate when my hands met her breast, which seemed to melt at my touch, causing her nipple to grow taut in them. She shuddered against me, her breathing hitched in my mouth stealing away what air I had left, causing a weird sensation to roll through me all the way down to my feet. I didn't know what it the hell that was…lust maybe? Or something I knew I wasn't ready for yet but all I knew now was that I wanted that feeling everyday for the rest of my life.

She pulled away from me to catch her breath I tried to as well but I couldn't stop myself from touching her with my mouth. I kissed her chin then down to her neck inhaling her sweet scent there. Leah smell like earth like it did in the morning after a night rain. A sweet fresh real scent and now it was mixed it with the smell of attraction. I groaned against her neck inhaling greedily. It was so strong that even though I had never smelled it before I recognized it instantly. I felt her hands slide down my abs, I could feel her delicate fingers ripple over each one of them, and the further down they went the harder I kissed her neck urging her to keep going. She looped her hands around the hem of my sweats, pulling them down; I stepped out of them quickly. Her hand found me and with one single touch I was hers for as long as she wanted because I had just been sent to heaven. Her warm hand, soft but direct, slid down then up. This time _my_ breath caught. I had never been anywhere near this far with a girl before but I wasn't nervous, there was no room for it when you were with her, you had to be sure.

I slipped my hands back under her shirt lifting it off and tossing it to the side, and stopped for a moment to just look, taking in every inch of the exposed caramel coffee skin that looked so good my mouth watered. She bit her lip as I went in for her shorts, arching up to me letting me know she wanted this bad just as bad as I did. The shorts dropped to her ankles, she kicked them aside quickly as I picked her up and laid her on the ground. I was now pressed on the inside of her thigh aching to move forward but I wanted to take my time, not trying to rush it because who knew how long I would last, this would be my first time. She had other intentions she tried to wiggle down to me, her body arching stuffing her breast right in my face. I pressed her down gently and gave her a stern look. _Patience_. I moved my hand from around her and downward, stopping at the place I knew she wanted me to touch. I sunk one finger in and a small whimper escaped her lips, I moved it around, in and out learning what she liked and she had no problem showing me. I went with my instincts as I inserted another finger and rubbed her with my thumb. She cried out her nails sinking into my shoulder, her body arching up to me. I did it again and she clinched up around me, around my fingers. She cried out my name as her eyes squeezed, her mouth in a permanent 'o' _Did she just..._ I looked down at my now soaked hand and knew that answer. I smiled a smug smile inside knowing that I had giving her that pleasure. I watched her enjoy the feeling as it had spread through her entire being.

Her eyes opened finally as she controlled her breathing before bringing her hands around my neck and pulling me to her lips. She kissed me hard her lips still trembled beneath mine as she angled her body towards me. I glide myself into her causing both of us to groan. I opened my eyes, breathing hard against her lips. She felt too good, warm, wet, and tight. This time I shuddered against her. She lifted up taking more of me in and I groaned. My hands scrap her thigh. I gather myself enough and dared myself to move. I pushed my hips to meet hers. Another groan escaped me. I wasn't going to last long actually surprised I lasted this long. I moved harder, faster, causing Leah to shake. She was close. I made one last final move, thrusting upward. She screamed in my ear her hand griped on my arm hard and she squeezed me. All of me. Her undoing was mine as well. I released myself in her the sensation flowing through every cell in my body, my eyes rolled back and my head followed. I collapsed onto her as she shook under me both of us breathing in each others ears heavily. I finally opened my eyes, willed my body to removed myself from her (trust me that wasn't easy), and move to the side. My eyes felt heavy, my body was weak, and I barely got my arms around her before I closed my eyes again, this time they didn't open back up.

Leah POV

I opened my eyes to see the darkness around me. _What the…?_ I tried to move but a heavy arm had me pinned. I didn't have to turn to know who it was. Jacob. Oh. My mind flashed back to what had taken place earlier in this very same spot. _Oh shit how stupid was that! I really hadn't been thinking at all had I?_ I can't believe I had let my feelings, as confusing as they were, get the best of me. I knew better, I knew what was going on. I had developed feelings for Jacob because he had helped me through the storm I was facing. I knew that without him I couldn't have faced my pain so soon. He had been my rescuer, my hero and like every other stupid damsel in distress I had contorted my gratitude into something completely stupid and wrong. I fought back a groan and tried to move, slither from underneath him but there was no use. I had to wake him.

"Jake" I said softly smacking him on the arm that was pinning me down.

He groaned and shifted his arm moved off of me. I sat up putting my knees to my chest covering my naked body as I looked around for my clothes.

"Leah" Jacob said next to me his voice was rough and sluggish. He looked beat.

I smiled slightly as he opened his eyes. This funny warm feeling shot through me as our eyes met in the darkness, making my heart thump into my chest. Ugh, I'm such a girl sometimes.

"Hey" I said trying to be nonchalant.

"Hey" he said back in the same tone as he sat up. As tired as he looked I could see how relieved he looked, how his smile seemed to reach new heights. _Had I done that? _

"Have you seen my clothes?" I asked nervously, I didn't want to mention anything that had to do with what had gone on even though it was hard to avoid when we were here naked, but I needed my clothes. He looked behind him and sighed.

"I think there back over by the tree." He said gesturing behind him. I stood up quickly and walked over to the tree grabbing my clothes. I just wanted to get out of here and forget this all happened.

"Leah" Jacob said griping my arm as I pulled on my shirt. I looked up at him angrily. _Didn't he see how uncomfortable I was?_ I just wanted to escape and he wasn't letting me.

"This was a mistake, Jake you know that." I said already knowing what he had to say. I knew him too well.

"You don't even know what this is, Leah." He spat back at me. _Well, well looks like the old Jake is back._ I squared my jaw, narrowing my eyes at him.

"It doesn't matter I-" My voice dropped when he took my face into his hands. I couldn't even think about talking, shit I could barely breathe.

"Don't do this. You know you don't want to. You know you don't want to shut me out. You know you don't want to run away from me. I don't know what's going on here either but I do know that I meant what I said that day on the beach. I can't live without you in my life especially now." He sighed and took a small step back.

"I'm sorry if I took advantage of that trust you had in me and I'll do anything to make that up to you but don't shut me out. Please." His eyes softened when he said please, it was like he was begging me.

He was right of course I didn't want to shut him out. I didn't want to run from him because he was so important to me now. He had become my hero, my best friend, my confidant. He had become the only person I felt l could trust; the only one I felt safe enough to cry in front of. I counted on him and he counted on me. His expression reflected mine. He was just as unsure as I was, just as afraid as I was. I didn't want to let him down because letting him down would only hurt myself, it would only set me back. I didn't want to be that Leah anymore. I didn't want to look in the mirror and not recognize myself anymore. I wanted be free of that decision that was made for me but changed every aspect of my life. I wanted to heal, the right way. I sighed and wrapped my arms around Jacob burying my face in his bare chest. Jake and I were connected my healing was his too and his was mine. Whatever was happening, however we were to get back to that point in life when things were ok we had to do it together. We were connected. Always would be, maybe always had been.

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**Tada! Longest chp so far! Let me know how you like the lemon it was my first one so I wasn't too sure about it. R+R! Chp 5 should b out next week or maybe earlier if I get the time so be on the look out.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Here's Chp 5 enjoy folks!**

**I own nothing!**

Leah's POV

_Baby steps Leah, baby steps_. I told myself as I sat in the car trying to talk myself out of making this journey.

This was not a baby step by any means this was a huge step and I was worried I would trip and fall flat on my face. I wanted to do this, I wanted to see her, let her know I was ok but I knew the second I stepped into that house I would be faced with a part of my past, apart of me that I no longer was. I looked over to the empty seat of my car and sighed. Jake's perfect little ass was now imprinted in it. I hated to admit it but I missed him but even so I wanted to do this alone. After another 5 minutes of weighing the pros and cons I turned the car back on and headed up the street. I couldn't be afraid of this because this would help me get over my pain; though it might set me back a little, in the end it would help me.

I parked my car and turned it off when I arrived and took a deep breath before getting out and heading to the door. It swung open before I could make it up the 3 steps.

"Oh Leah, I'm so happy you came." She said hugging me.

I returned it forcing a smile on my face. It wasn't like I wasn't happy to see her; it was just bittersweet that these were the conditions that we now had to meet in. I was just Leah, and she was just Nora, Sam's mother, no longer my future mother in law.

I had grown pretty close to Nora when I dated Sam; in fact she was there for me more than my own mother sometimes. I had been looking forward to having her as my mother in law. I had always pictured us having breakfast together on Sundays, going shopping for my wedding dress, then for maternity clothes, and then baby clothes. I knew how bad she wanted to be a grandmother. I winced a little at that, a pain digging into my heart something way worse than my pain about Sam. I felt her hand on my shoulder, calling me into attention.

"Huh?" I said trying to remember what she had asked me. Honestly I don't even remember walking in the house or sitting down at the table.

"I said would you like some water?" She repeated.

"Oh, um yes please." I said looking back at her.

She smiled and turned back to the kitchen. I could hear her grabbing the glasses and pouring the water and then making her way back over to me. "So how have you been, sweetie?" She said while sitting the glass in front of me.

"Better" I responded flatly. My eyes kept diverting around the house. It looked different now but my eyes kept picking up on the small things that were the same. A chip in the wood here, dent in the wall there. I could feel my throat closing up as I remembered all the years I spent here with Sam, old memories coming back to haunt me.

"That's good." She said then sighed heavily causing me to look back to her. "It shouldn't be like this, you know. I don't want our relationship to be like this. I still consider you my daughter, Leah. We can be like we once were. Just because Sam…" She stopped when she saw my expression. I'm pretty sure my face wasn't pleasant to look at right now. I was more pissed than hurt because she was just another thing Sam had taken from me.

"He was never good enough for you, Leah. I always knew that but I was so happy my son had chosen such a great girl that I never told him he didn't deserve you." She said rubbing my hand for comfort.

I sighed and changed the subject. "How have you been? The house looks great by the way." I said with a small smile.

She caught my drift and nodded launchinginto her tale about the renovations on the house and then into her new love life. Sam had told me once how she never got over his father leaving, which was the main reason he hated him so much, but now she seemed ok with it all. I envied her because even though it had take Nora 16 years I felt like I would never get there with myself. When I realize I had been here for a couple of hours I started gathering myself to go.

"I should be going." I told her. She sighed and nodded.

"You don't have to be a stranger though right? I miss you around here." She pouted. I nodded.

"I miss you too." I managed to say as I got up.

She placed a hand on my shoulder to stop me. "He doesn't come around a lot anymore because I'm not all that nice to Emily and I keep telling him he made the wrong choice." She admitted.

"You shouldn't fight with him because of me. I'll… I'll be ok besides she's better for him than I could've been." I said to her actually meaningevery word of it. Emily was better for Sam, hell I would've probably gotten him killed with my crazy ass. Nora shook her head fiercely.

"I couldn't believe that for a second because I see it all over you face. You couldn't be in that much pain if you didn't love him as much as you did. You love him so much more than she could ever love him even now I see it, Sweetie. I just wish he would too." She said her tears falling down.

I took a deep breath her words cutting in too deep for me to handle at the moment. "I never said she loved him more, she couldn't even if she tried but she'll love him better, be a better wife to him, a better mother to his children, a better shoulder to lean on when he needs it. He realized that and you need to, too." I said. I could feel myself splitting at the seams. "Look…we'll always be apart of each other lives those 3 years guaranteed that, it'll just be different now." I said assuring her.

She nodded and hugged me. "Take care and don't let it be so long between visits, ok?" She said squeezing me.

I hugged her back and nodded then made my way back out the door. I got in the car and drove just far enough to get out of her sight then I put the car in park. My chest was rising and falling with every second, my breathing shallow and quick. I growled and smacked the steering wheel, hard enough to make my hand bruise but not as hard as to damage the car. I hit it again and again imaging it was Sam, taking all my frustrations out on it. I hated what had become of me, I hated the life I lived, and I hated how one decision caused me so much pain. I hated it all. When it was over, surprisingly the steering wheel was intact, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and waited.

* * *

Jacob's hand skimmed across the bare skin of my back then I could feel his warm lips kiss me following the pattern his hand had just made. I sighed contently a small smile crept on my face, which refused to disappear. I felt like I shouldn't be happy after the day I had had. All those feelings I had in the car should still be with me but they were now replaced with happiness and that other feeling I had when I was around Jacob, that one I didn't recognize. It was like he had the cure to my disease. Jacob placed his hands around my bruised ones, seeming to heal them with his warm touch. His bare chest pressed against my back, I could feel the ripples of his abs against my lower back. I felt his warm breath nearingmy ear, ticklingit there. I giggled quietly, moving my head to face him. He grinned at me and leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. Our lips touched softly as he rubbed my sides. A warm sensation crawled up to my throat as I broke away and took a deep breath, steadying myself. I turned over and reached out for him. He took my hand instantly and kissingit and placingit on his heart which I could feel thrumming through my hand; my smile got wider. I sat up and removed my hand kissing where it had been as he wrapped his arms around me. I had always loved Jacob's strong heart, how it seemed so sure, it never flutters or falters, kind of like Jacob. What I didn't know was how much his heart was apart of my sanity until he gave me more than I asked for. I ran my hands up his chest and across his strong shoulders, and then down his powerful arms each motion caused him to quiver. He laced his fingers in mine and kissed my forehead before I laid it on his chest listeningto his strong heart. Everything about Jacob and I'srelationship had become so much more to me than I ever expected to be. Our interaction, even the smallest, was more intimate than anything I had with Sam. I didn't know what was going on but I felt powerless to stop it.

Jacob's POV

After seeing Leah to her house I headed to mine. Rushing through the door, I headed to the shower regretfully washingLeah's scent off. It didn't feel right but I knew it was necessary. It was strange how close I felt to her, how life just didn't feel right if she wasn't in it. This was why I wasn't too hyped up for this upcoming event. I felt bad that I had done Embry and Quil like this that I wasn't even excited to hang out with them. I wanted to go right back over to Leah's and lie next to her and touch her, and feel her skin next to mine. I groaned and turned the water to cold, taming the stiffeningbetween my legs. Once it was down I sighed and shook my head. _Something is definitely wrong with me._ I got out, got dress and went into the garage waiting for them. _'Some guy time' yeah that's what I needed._ I rolled my eyes at the thought, if the guys knew what I was doing with Leah I'm sure they wouldn't mind me leaving them hanging for awhile. But honestly for me it wasn't about the sex, that was a new thing for us but I felt like this even before I made a move on her, which I have to say was the best decision I ever made, it all started the day I found her on the mountain top.

"Yo Jake." Quil said pulling me out my thoughts.

I looked up to see them both heading into the garage. They waved as they looked around with confusing faces.

"What?" I asked them.

"It smells like Leah in here." Quil said scrunching his nose.

"And it's clean." Embry added.

I rolled my eyes and inhaled, yup it did smell like Leah in here…good. Embry grabbed himself a soda out the ice chest and threw one to Quil.

"So what's been up, dude? How's Lola?" He said looking over to my car. Yeah that's her name. _Lola Bunny, _she is a rabbit after all.

"Good I guess she needs some new tires these are getting pretty bald." I stood up and kicked the tire.

"Well lets go." Quil said jump off the table. I sighed and agreed if this was what we were goingto do I was all for it. Anything was better than them drilling me about what I had done these pass weeks.

After our success at the junkyard we headed back to the garage to swap out the tires.

"So Seth wants to go to the batting cages tomorrow, you game?" Quil asked.

"Who's all going?" I asked. I had a feeling if Seth was going some people were not.

"Just us…since you've been monopolizing his sister he's been hanging with us. Plus he still refuses to patrol with Sam so…" Embrysighed sittingon the crate next to me. I looked down and shook my head. Seth, like his sister, didn't change his mind very often so he had stuck to the avoidingSam thingeven when he couldn't avoid phasing. I was just lucky he let me off the hook so easily.

"Yeah we'll go." I said without thinking.

He cocked an eyebrow at me. "We?" He questioned. I could see Quil folding his arms in the background.

"You think Seth wouldn't want his sister to come?" I asked. What I wanted to say was you think I could spend a whole day without her?

Embrysighed and shook his head. "She's different now huh? Seth says she laughs and stuff." He said hopeful. I nodded and he smiled at that.

She and Embrywere close before the wolf thing mainly because I was too busy up Bella's ass and Quil was too busy up every other girl's ass. _I wonder if he had a thing for her?_ I questioned in my mind. Heat flushed down my spine immediately at the thought. _He'd die before I let him have her._ I growled under my breath but they both caught it.

"You ok?" Quil asked. I nodded and squeezed the can I was holding to calm myself. Some part of me, albeit a small part, wanted to rip my own best friend's throat out. _What the hell has she done to me?_

* * *

I tapped my foot impatiently on the floor as I waited for Leah to come downstairs.

"She's so slow." Seth scowled.

"I'd still bet on her before you though." Quil said next laughing.

I huffed and headed upstairs to her. As I got to the top she was coming down the hall. I groaned as I watched her walk to me. I was hoping I could have a nice day a day where I wouldn't be caught staring at Leah with drool hanging out my mouth but she had other plans. Of course I was going to be salivating for her but this dress she had on was going to make me jump her and hump her like a dog in front of everybody.

"You look great" I said my voice was strained due to that fact that my heart was trying to crawl up my throat. She smiled proudly at my reaction.

"I figured if you're dragging me to your boys day out then I might as well look good." She shrugged.

I ran my hand over her waist and pulled her flushed to me. Her breath caught a little. "You always look good." I whispered and leaned in to kiss her.

* * *

_I'm going to Hell._ I thought to myself as I watch Leah in the batting cage. I peeked over to Seth and the others nervously for a second hoping they hadn't caught me yet. I sighed when I realized they were in their own world talking about something meaningless to me. I turned back to Leah happily to know the coast was clear. I drank her up from the sneakers she had on to the dress that hung low at the top, showing enough cleavage to make a werewolf sweat. I winced at the pain of my erection pressing against my jeans. _This was so wrong._ _How could I be eye fucking the shit out of Leah and getting hard as I do so while standing right next to her little brother?_I was a shitty role model or whatever I was suppose to be to Seth.

She swung again and I gulped as her dress flared almost showing off her boy shorts I knew she had on from the feel up I did on her when we were at the house. I almost let out a moan. She knocked the ball right into the target then twirled the bat waiting for another one, her ass swaying side to side. My heart was so far up my throat I almost choked on it. I had to look elsewhere, anywhere. Quil was telling Seth how to get into a stance while Embry observed and commented every now and then. I looked pass them to see that I wasn't the only one enjoying the view. Some perv had his eyes on her as he played with his phone. I got up within a second and stomped over to him.

"Hey asshole quit looking at her." I spat at him knocking his tiny phone out his hand.

"Hey what's your problem?" He yelled at me in shock.

"You…looking at her like that, I should rip your eyes out and shove them down your throat." I yelled at him grasping his collar.

"Jake" I heard someone say behind me, I couldn't tell who.

"I wasn't looking at her, man." he said to me.

"Fucking liar you had your eyes all over her, I saw you." I hissed at him before I felt her hand on mine.

"Come on let's go Jake." She whispered.

"Dude what the fuck has gotten into you?" Embry said.

Seth picked up the guys phone, apologizing until he looked down at it and growl. "I'm going to fucking kill you." He said almost lunging at the guy before Quilhad him restrained. "You were taking pictures of my sister, you pervert!" He growled.

My grip which had loosened a little got tighter again and I shook the bastard.

"Jake Stop! You'll kill him." Leah said.

"Let him." Seth said immediately followed by agreement from Quil and Embry.

Leah groaned and turned to me. She knew she had me before she even uttered the words. "Let him go." She said firmly, looking me in the eyes.

My hand loosened on his collar, and then I stepped away and let him go. I tried to look else where but she had me trapped, I couldn't leave her eyes. It was like she was the one squeezing me by the collar refusing to let go. She gave me a small smile before turning to the guy and swinging. _Crack _went the sound of her fist connecting with his nose making all of us wince. _Ouch_. He groaned and stumbled on the ground, nose bleeding. _The asshole deserved it_. She glared at him for a second before heading over to Seth to calm him down. Seth dropped the phone and Quil stepped on it, shattering it in pieces. I didn't look at the guy anymore I just focused on trying to control my heartbeat, it was hammering through my chest I was sure if the guys were paying attention they could've heard it. I took a couple deep breaths then looked down. _Fuck, I need another cold shower._

After the batting cages we headed over to the snack bar and filled up. Quil was goingover what else he wanted to do here as Leah got up and threw her tray away. I willed myself not to watch her, not to give myself away, so I listened to Seth mumbled about the batting cages, which he wasn't so good at. A soft laughter caught my attention. I knew that laugh. I turned and grumbled to myself. Yeah I should've gone with her because once again some guy had his eyes on her. To his defense she was talking to him. _Actually she looked like she was flirting with him. _I thought as I watched her bat her eyes at him and squeeze his bicep. _What the HELL?_ _Was she trying to make me jealous? _She knew that I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. Quilwas already looking at me funny; luckily Seth and Embryseemed oblivious though. I stood up and that caught her eye. She told the guy something then walked back to us. My fist balled up in my pocket as I saw him as he watched her walk away his eyes permanently glued to her ass.

"You guys wanna knock these guys off their high horses?" She came over grinning gesturing back to the crowd of guys. I looked at her in confusion. "Their reining paintball champs…2 years running" she rolled her eyes. "I told them we would play them." She continued still grinning ear to ear.

Quil and Embry's ears perked up. "Hell yeah." Embry said.

"I thought it might be kind of fun deflating their egos. What do you say, Sethy poo?" She said bumping shoulders with Seth who just smiled at her. "Let's go we need get our gear." She said towing Seth along. We followed.

"I've missed this Leah." Quil laughed.

We got all set-up as the others waited. They were completely confident that they would win.I guess they thought our size would hinder us, make us slow and easy targets._ Stupid_. One of the guys, the one Leah had been talkingto, smiled as we showed Seth how to use the paintball gun. I heard him mutter somethingabout an easy 50 bucks. I sighed and shook my head. I should've known Leah would make this interesting. _Why else would she be doing this?_

"Alright boys…" She said calling us into attention as she whipped out a map of the area we were to play in. "Quil I want you here, covering this area, Embry here covering the opposite side…" She gestured to points on the map. It was easy to see she had her game face on, when it involved a bet Leah always had her game face on. "The tall one will go after Jacob thinking he'll be here but Jake I want you on my flank in this dug out here…that'll make up for your height." She smiled quickly at me then she put her arms around Seth. "Seth, you have the best eyes, so you're going to be my sniper. The little one is assigned to take me out, I'm sure. You have to find him and take him out before he can do the same to me, Ok?" she said looking Seth in the eyes. He nodded and took a deep breath. She snickered evilly pulling her lips up into a matching grin. "Showtime"

"Like taking candy from a baby" She chuckled as she fanned the money across her face with her feet propped up on the dash, looking very proud of herself. She should be her plans worked out perfectly and we took down the 2 year champs in less than 20 minutes.

"So I guess I should split this with you huh?" She said looking back at Quil, Seth, and Embry in the back seat. I could practically hear Quil scowl at her.

"Fine, how bout pizza and a movie at my place, mom's working the night shift." She suggested.

They agreed but I had to pout a little. _I wanted her all to myself tonight I had shared her enough for one day._I grumbled mentally as we headed home. We grabbed Saw VI from the rental store and then headed to the Clearwater's. Leah was the first in the door going straight for the phone to order the pizza. I sat in my now usual spot, next to Leah's usual spot while the others found their seats. Quil put in the movie and we got about 30 minutes in before the doorbell rang and the pizza arrived. Leah paid with our prize money and passed around the boxes. We ate our fill as we watched the movie. 2 hours later, the credits rolled and Embry got up to turned it off.

"That was good but I think I'm even more confused now." He said rubbing his head.

"Yeah their goingto have to make a movie just to explain everything it'll be Saw 15: The Explanation." Quil said laughing.

I snorted a little and looked over to a sleeping Leah, her feet on my lap her head in her hands lying on the arm of the sofa.

"I guess she wolf can't hang." Quil observed then looked over at Seth who had conked out too.

"Neither can little brother." Embry laughed.

"I'm goingto take her up to her room, you should get Seth. Sue would be pissed if we let him sleep in the chair like that." I said lookingover at him. He was sitting up with his legs draped across the other chair, arms to the side, head back as far as it could go with his mouth wide open, that couldn't be comfortable. Embry and Quil both got sneaky looks on their faces.

"Sure…let's get him up to his room, Em." Quil said slyly. Embry grabbed Seth's arms and Quil grabbed his feet. They both grunted.

"Kid weighs a ton!" Embry groaned as they headed for the stairs.

"No wonder he's so slow" Quil chuckled. _Thump._

"Oops" Embry said then they both laughed.

I chuckled quietly and pulled Leah into my arms getting upstairs in her room and laying her down on the bed.

"Jake" She groaned and shifted, opening her eyes and looking around.

"Movie's over" I whispered sitting down next to her.

"Oh…how was the ending?" She asked sitting up meeting my eyes.

"Confusing" I muttered and put my hands under her chin, kissing her softly. I pulled back and sighed. "I've wanted to do that all day." I grinned at her. She laughed once and rolled her eyes.

"You know you looked pretty damn good when you were all worked up today, Jealousy looks good on you." She laughed and tilted her head.

"Yeah and you had fun getting me all worked up too, huh? By the way I'm buying you a batter's helmet tomorrow; you look sexy as hell in it." I whispered putting the moves on her.

I pushed my chest into hers as I went in for her lips. She laid back obediently and wrapped her arm around my neck. The other one went under my shirt scrapping her nails against my chest. I groaned in her mouth as she looped her tongue around mine. My hands trailed up her ribcage and one firmly grasped her breast, making her shiver against me. We broke for air and she pulled me completely on top of her, spreading her legs and wrapping them around me as I kissed her neck, nipping at her ear. I pulled back to look at her beautiful face, she licked her lips invitingly. As I went back in a scream erupted from the hall causing us both to jump and look at the door. _Shit we're caught!_ We both let out a sigh of relief when we realized it was closed. Laughter erupted from the other side of the door.

"You son's a bitches" Seth yelled followed by Embry and Quil laughing even louder. Growlingand a lot of commotion followed. Something broke which caused Leah and I both to groaned, unwillingly unwrap ourselves from each other, and head for the door.

"What's going on?" Leah said coming out into the hall and heading for the light of the bathroom.

We walked in and there Seth was drenched in water trying to fight off Quil and Embry. I looked over to the bath tub that was full of water and ice. I laughed falling against the wall as I remembered Seth pansy ass shriek. Leah did too before pushing Embry into the tub, and then helpingSeth by tripping Quil making him fall in the tub next to Embry.

Seth grinned at his sister. "Thanks, sis" He said.

"Anytime, now open up the windows before the wet dog smell gets all over the house." She laughed then disappeared out the door. The guys looked over to me as I let her pass.

"You could've at least pushed her into the tub with us, what kind of friend are you Jake?" Quil grumbled as he got up.

"Yeah man don't you remember the guy code?" Embryadded gettingup and shaking his hair dry.

"Yeah bros before ho-" Seth cut him off with a growl.

"Well you know what I mean." He amended then shoved Seth back into the water.

"Awwcome on guys no fair." Seth whined slipping as he tried to get out too fast.

"That's for screaming like a girl." Embry said as we all laughed.

* * *

So there you have it. I wanted this chp to show the intimacy of the couple but then I thought it needed some lightening up so I added some pack fun to the mix. Hope you liked it. Thanks so very, very much to my lovely reviewers I enjoy reading your opinions on this story and it defiantly helps me improve on my writing. Keep em coming!


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Finally it's here! I know, I know it's been awhile since I've updated but I had mad writer's block so I worked on other fics to help it along, then got stuck on those. Crazy! Anyways, finally found my inspiration (thanks to my 2 boy bestfriends...muah muah) and finished it. I tweaked a couple things last minute so I'm apologizing ahead of time for the mistakes. Thanks so much for tolerating me and my spazziness. Love all my readers/reviewers/subscribers, don't know what I would do without you. **XOXO****

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* * *

****Chapter 6**

Jacob's POV

As I walked through the familiar forest surrounding La Push a sense peace and contentment flowed through me. On most days these woods were eerie, cold and dark but not today. Today the forest was loud, birds chirping, animals moving around the treetops, the weather was nice, and the sun was out. And with Leah softly moving beside me the day couldn't get any better. I smiled a little then caught myself, hoping Leah didn't catch it she would probably make some snide remark about how I must be crazy if I'm smiling for no apparent reason. I peaked down to her to see her wearing a goofy grin herself. A laugh escaped me before I smacked my hand over my mouth.

"Mental hospital" she said smacking the back of my head. I just rolled my eyes at her preferring not to point out that she was the one with the Cheshire cat smile. After another half hour we arrived to our destination.

"It's smaller than I remember it." She grimaced looking up the tree.

I laughed. "Yeah well we were like 10 and 11 when were here last what would you think?" I informed her. I rolled her eyes. Sue had found a picture of me, her, Embry, and Quil at this tree when we were little and Leah decided to have a little blast with the past. My memory here wasn't too great considering she pushed me out the tree and I got a big gash on my head.

"Whatever, I'll race ya to the top." She said running ahead of me.

I ran to catch up, pulling her down before she could get over the first branch. "Cheater" I accused her as I got my footing and pulled myself up over the branch.

She laughed and got back up and I could hear her maneuvering through the trees. Suddenly she was ahead of me. _Damn, the girls fast._

"I think all the extra muscle you've put on has made you slow." she laughed. Hearing her laughter made me laugh; it was so contagious with her. "I'm creaming you! You wanna give it up?" she shouted down to me.

I growled. "I'm no quitter." I told her, pushing myself harder, faster.

"Fine, I'll be waiting at the top I could probably whip up something while I'm waiting, what would you like?" She chuckled.

"Fuck you, Leah" I spat at her pulling myself to the side where she was.

"Oh that's real nice Jacob; you've always been a sore loser, you know... I won." She said next then proceeded to yawn and act impatient as I made my way up to her, only a few seconds behind.

"You know you're not a good winner either." I grumbled as I reached the top or the highest we could go up.

She grinned and looked around. "Nice view." she breathed.

I nodded but my focus couldn't be anywhere else but on the women in front of me. She had become so much more to me lately and it was hard not to develop feelings for her. They were platonic at first, just friends then the more we leaned on each other for support the more important we became to one another, the more we cared about each other.

"So you won… what's the prize?" I stepped closer to her and grinned.

She raised her brow and brought her hand onto my bare chest. "Oh I think I already have It." she smiled sexily as she brought her body to mine.

I pressed my lips to hers and she devoured them greedily, aggressively. It was a release for both of us probably more for her; I had zero experience with this before her. She broke away first, tilting her head back allowing me access to her amazing neck. I went in with a growl inhaling her scent then kissing her, nipping slightly causing her to groan.

"Umm Jake." she groaned and reached for my sweats.

"Here?" I asked, as I slipped my hands under her shirt grasped her breast in my hands. She shuddered against me, her lower half pressing moving against my length, I groaned into her hair.

"Yes, definitely yes." she breathed pulling down my sweats.

I lifted her up against the tree, holding her tiny waist as she used her feet to pull down my sweats more. I quickly undid her shorts damn near ripped them off of her. It was hard to control myself when we were like this, all lusty for one another. I slipped off her shirt allowing me the best view in the world, _Leah...naked_. I moaned at the sight the blood rushing downward making me impossibly harder. She looked down and bit her lip, a desperate look in her eyes. I wouldn't let her suffer any longer. I pulled her legs around me and slipped in, we both sighed in relief. It was like a need that had finally been filled. I closed my eyes and rested in the crook of her neck both of adjusting to the feeling. She trembled against me and everything just felt right, it felt fucking great to have her small naked body pressed against me, my dick inside her, her trembling at the pleasure I was giving. I loved it. She moaned as she tilted her hips towards me. I groaned and pushed back, hard.

"Oh god" she screamed making some of the birds from the surrounding trees to fly away. I laughed lightly then I could feel her tightening around me, turning my laugh into a moan.

"Mmmm you feel so good." I whispered in her ear.

Ours hips met again and again each time causing us to moan, groan or grunt in satisfaction. As soon as the rhythm caught I picked up the pace. She arched against me, stuffing her breast in my face, her back scrapping against tree. She hissed at the pressure and smiled.

"You like that huh?" I asked her, pressing her harder against the tree.

She gasped and nodded. "Harder Jake." she begged me.

I was happy to oblige. Bringing one of her legs onto my shoulder and placing my hand around her neck I drove into her, hard, balls deep. She cried out grabbing the branch above her trying to pull away from me, but I wasn't letting her go.

She moaned my name as she trashing her head from side to side her. I could practically see her eyes cross from behind her lids as she tightened, and tightened, and squeezed me for all I was worth. I held on as long as I could for her but it was too much. She screamed out one final time, her walls putting a death grip on my dick, and I was done. Bringing my body impossibly closer to hers I came frantically inside her, filling her until my legs gave out and I collapsed down onto the tree.

We stayed there breathing hard into each others faces. My legs were folded underneath me while hers were wrapped around my waist. Once my breathing slowed I opened my eyes. Blinking until my vision became clear to see hers still closed her body still shaking. I had to move, the position wasn't so comfortable, so I pulled out of her and shifted my legs she gasped and moaned her eyes squeezing closed.

"Jake…" she breathed opening her eyes. I felt my heart squeeze a little as I saw those big brown eyes. "…it should be illegal to feel that good." She finished and leaned over to me taking deep breaths.

I laughed and nodded. "Well how bout I handcuff you next time." I proposed placing my arm around her kissing her forehead.

"That would be nice…" she laughed and attempted to lean back taking me with her, obviously forgetting we were in a tree. "Oh shit…" She said as I steadied us.

"Let's get out this tree so I can lay down…you wore me out." I grinned at her as she rolled her eyes and got up.

We made our way down the tree grabbing our clothes in the process then lie at the base of it and fell asleep.

* * *

I opened my eyes when I felt the rain drops on my feet. I sat up slightly and looked to my right. Leah was sleeping silently next to me curled into me. She hadn't felt the rain yet, but I knew we should be heading back before it got too late.

"Hey" I rubbed her back.

She groaned. "Jake five more minutes" she mumbled sleepily her usual response when I tried to wake her in the mornings after her patrol.

I laughed; she thought she was at home. "Lee, it's starting to rain." I told her shaking her.

She opened her eyes and looked up confused. "Oh yeah." She yawned and stretched. I got up and helped her up.

"Man it looks like we'll be soaked by the time we get back to your place." I said looking out as the rain quickly turning from a drizzle to storm.

She raised a brow and laughed. "I'm already soaked because of you"

I grabbed her ass and pulled her to me. "Really? Let me check…" I grinned, and creeping my fingers under her shorts.

She grabbed my hand to stop me. "Oh, no you don't." she said dancing out my grip. "You've had enough for today." She laughed and walked out to the rain.

I pouted for a second then walked out from the cover of the tree and followed her home.

We walked in the house and we both headed up to Leah's room to change into something dry, while Leah finished drying off I headed back downstairs and sat on the couch, inhaling the scent of Sue's Lasagna. My stomach growled in satisfaction.

"So Jake, you hungry?" Sue called from the kitchen.

"Always" I answered back.

I heard her soft laugh from the kitchen. Seth strolled in with Quil, they were arguing about some game. Seth stopped and sniffed the air with a grin.

"Smells good mom?" Seth asked as he went into the kitchen.

Quil sat next to me nodded my way then reach over and grabbed the remote. Something stopped him, something he smelled. He sniffed the air again then turned his nose my way. I flinched back from him.

"What?" I asked him.

Leah came down a second later and sat on the other side of me putting her feet on my lap. "What's up pedophile?" She grinned as she grabbed the remote from him.

"Oh my god" Quil said then fell out on the floor laughing. "This is so insane..." he laughed. We looked at him in confusion. He gathered himself and looked at us. "Just please, please, please let me be there when you tell Sam...please." he begged.

Leah groaned and I growled. _Fucking Quil's super nose_. He had the best nose in the pack of course he could smell the sex on us even if the rain should have washed it all off. "Shut the fuck up Quil, you don't know what you're talking about." I hissed at him.

He grinned. "Sure I don't" he waved it off as Seth came in grinning.

"Mom made chocolate cake Lee..." he said to her.

She rolled her eyes again and got up going into the kitchen. I watched after her until she was out of sight. "You got it, you got it bad." Quil sung the Usher song horribly. I smacked him.

"Leah how'd you get all those scratches on your back." Sue said. My eyes bugged out and Quil laughed causing Seth to look at us suspiciously. _This was going to be a long dinner._

I walked home after a very nerve wrecking dinner. I could tell that this wasn't going to be a secret for long, which was alright with me but Leah… I wasn't sure about that. The whole dinner she seemed on edge about Quil and his little side comments. I think she was worried about Seth knowing. Remembering Seth reactions awhile back I'm sure if he would hang me if he didn't agree with this. But how could he say this was wrong. I thought as I thought of her smile, her laughter. She was happy with me and that's all that should matter to him. I sighed trying to steal my over-reactive heart. _She was happy with me, and that was all that mattered to me. _

When I got to my house my dad was at the table something in his hand he apparently didn't want me to see as he tried to tuck it away when I came barging in the door.

"What's that?" I asked curiously with a stupid grin on my face. I was still on cloud 9 from earlier, I tried to shake it off but I couldn't.

He raised his brow then turned it over. It was a RSVP for Bella's wedding. _Bella_. One reminder of her sent me plummeting down to the ground. I hadn't thought of her since...well since I got the invite and that stupid note from her leech, that was the day Leah and I started this thing that's going on now. I gulped and sat in the chair carefully bracing myself for the pain that was about to hit. I knew it had to be coming even though I hadn't felt it in over 2 weeks.

"You're going?" I asked him. I could feel my breathing increase, my body was over-heating already.

He sighed. "Well I was hoping we'd go together." he proposed.

I snorted. "I don't think so, Dad." I said firmly.

"You don't want to say goodbye." he asked.

I felt the heat rise to my face as I thought of saying goodbye. It would be our final goodbye, I much rather my last memory of her not be when she's in her wedding dress arm and arm with him.

"I've already said my goodbyes Dad and so has she." I said through my teeth.

He sighed. "Jacob-" I slammed my fist on the table to stop him.

"I said NO!" I shouted and pushed myself off the chair and out the door.

I started walking towards the beach, I usually would go to the cliffs but now that place only held good memories of me and Leah and I didn't want to taint it with Bella. I walked over to our tree, really wishing I had an axe so I could destroy it, so I could take away all those painful memories.

"Did you really think I would go to your wedding?" I said out loud, silently hoping no one was here to hear me talking to myself. "Do you really think I would want to say goodbye to you like that?" I questioned shaking away the image of her in a wedding dress dancing with him. He was a fucking leech, my enemy, and she wanted to marry him, she want to be like him.

_You wouldn't have to change for me, Bella_.

My own words ringing in my head remembering that day I told her I loved her. I felt the branch in my hand and I snapped it. "I did so much for you, I risked my life for you, my pack's life for you, Leah's life for you…but it didn't matter did it?" I yelled.

I sat down and buried my head in my hands controlling myself not letting the anger push me to that point again. I was sure everyone was tired of hearing about it, hell I was tired of talking, thinking, and feeling it. I felt aged by it all, the memories, the pain, the regret was all weighing me down. It was taking me away from the person who I used to be, and I didn't want that anymore. I just want to be my old self again, be the way I am when I'm with Leah. _Leah._I opened my eyes remembering when we were here a time ago how we both were in a broken state. She was so much better and I thought I was too. "Should've known it wasn't going to be that easy." I muttered, laughing to myself. I was better then I was before maybe not as good as Leah but I had made some progress and it was because of her _So why would I not go to her now, when I needed her?_ I questioned myself as I got up and headed back for Leah.

I made it back to Leah's but the house was fairly quiet now. I should've known that, Sue and Leah both were getting ready for bed when I left. I couldn't knock this late so I made my way over to the tree outside her window and started climbing. I got to her window and tapped on it.

"Leah" I whispered.

I knocked on the window again and she opened up. I slipped through quietly as she backed away. She knew something was wrong by look on my face but instead of asking me about it she gave me what I needed first, she wrapped her arms around me and rubbed my back, comforting. I sighed into her hair pulling my arms around her. We stayed like that for god knows how long until I felt good enough to tell her.

"My dad wants me to go to the wedding to say goodbye." I whispered

She sighed towing me to the bed and sitting me down, then she sat on my lap. "You don't want to?" she guessed.

I shook my head. "Like I need to see that to know she's not mine. It was obvious the day I got that invite...it was nothing like her. She changed for him, she no longer the Bella I loved." I said a tremor rocked through me but a contained it.

She rubbed my arm gently. "It gets better, Jake. I promise." She assured me.

I laughed silently at her words remembering when I had spoken them to her in this very same room. It seems as if we had switched roles. I was strong when she needed me and now she was strong because I needed her. We were a perfect team. "It's already better, Lee. Everyday I'm with you I'm better." I told her. She pulled back and looked at me and gave me a sheepish smile that made my heart do back flips.

"Come here." I whispered pulled her to my lips.

She moaned into my mouth and placed her hands in my hair. I kissed her like I wanted to, like she deserved to be kissed. I kissed like I loved her, like she was everything to me, like she was my soul mate.

She pulled away only to bring her lips back to mine as she pushed me down onto the bed and straddles me. Knowing where this is leading I move my hand to her waist and up her shirt. She smacks it away and pulls it off herself then rips my shirt off. I growled lowly as I feel the blood rush to my dick. It's hard to not take control but I can't deny how incredible it feels to see her do it. She strips me down and then pushes herself off the bed and pulls off her pants, slowly. I can tell that she isn't doing this to tease me her movements are more intimate and personal than ever.

She makes her way up to me leaving kisses in her path upward. Its pure torture, to keep my hands off her, but I can't think of a better feeling. She's slow and methodical with her movements, taking her time, every now and then she looks up at me, making sure I'm paying attention. _How could I not be?_

She grabs my hand and moves it to her neck, dragging it downward. I curl my fingers so they dig into her skin, she gasps and close her eyes. She moves my hand over her breast, slowly, and then to her lower back where she holds into it as she straddles me. I groan, feeling the inside of her. She locks eyes with me and moves, lifting up and then back down onto me over and over again. Never once do we break eye contact. The intimacy of this time is beyond anything we've done before.

The way she looks at me, it's like she telling me how she feels through her eyes because all they say is how important I am to her, how much she cares about me, how much she depends on me. I might just be imagining it because that's what I'm telling her as I look into her eyes. I place my other hand on her hip as she impales me one more time making us both cum together. She doesn't close her eyes and neither do I, even though it's hard as she squeezes around me, pulling me into further bliss, milking me. Once she milked me dry she collapsed on me, trying to catch her breath. I moved the hair out her face, trying to see her face. I stroked her back, thinking of this time, thinking of all the emotions that came from the both of us. I felt like I had to tell her how I felt. It was now or never.

"You know I don't love her anymore." I said quietly. Leah looks up at me with a questioning eye. "I don't...not really." I sighed. "Things are changing. I used to think I couldn't live with her now I feel like I don't want to live without you." I told her. She looked up in shock, I felt her swallow hard. "It's not a necessity but I know how much it would suck if I didn't see you everyday, if I didn't feel you everyday." I rubbed her back again.

"So what are you saying, Jacob." She whispered, crawling up so we were eye to eye.

I take a deep breath. "I'm saying regardless of what happens next I want it to be with you... I want this it is to always be..." I said to her sighing in relief that it was off my chest.

She sat up this time her face a little serious than before. I knew what she was thinking and I wasn't going to let her past take her from me. Her weight shifted, she was moving off me. I shook my head and sat up meeting her eyes, wrapping my arm around her, refusing to let her leave.

"I have never felt so safe, so happy than I have in these past weeks and that because I found you, and I'm not letting you go." I said my voice came across sharp and aggressive. She flinches at the sharpness of my voice, so I take a deep breath to steady myself.

"I'm not asking for anything and you don't have to give me anything. Just continue to be everything that you already are to me. No commitment, no strings, no obligations, only if you want them. But I know you feel something, and it's more, Lee. More than anything we ever thought we could feel again. I'm not saying love just like, a lot of it. Just like me…real hard." I asked her. I felt like I had just asked her to marry me or something, that's how difficult it felt, how much I felt was at stake if she said no, how much I would be crushed.

Her eyes glistened through out my speech and when I finally shut my trap a tear fell. I could tell there was a battle within her, half telling her everything I had just said was true and the other comparing that to what Sam had told her years ago. She didn't want this to be the beginning of a new heartbreak. She was afraid she wouldn't be able to survive it again, but what I had said was different, it had to be. I wasn't Sam and she knew that.

She took a breath and started nodding. It felt like the world stopped. "Ok" she breathed. I gasped and smiled at the same time wrapping my arms around her in a bear hug closing my eyes and enjoying this moment.

* * *

**A/N: Whew, that was long! This was my favorite chp so far so I hope you guys liked it too. This chp is all Jacob's POV, I love writing his perspective but I will try to write more Leah next time. I'm already working on the next few chps in which Seth and Sam find out amongst other lovely and maybe lemony things. However there will be a delay in the already written chp. 7 (Curse you Blackberry software update!) Also the time of Breaking Dawn is approaching i.e. Bella's Wedding and the madness that follows so be on the look out. Read and Review peeps your input it what keeps me going!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I always forget to put this but as I'm sure we all know...I know nothing.**

**Chapter 7 **

**Jacob's POV**

I couldn't knock the dumb grin off my face the next morning as I strolled into the house, said hey to my dad, and headed for the shower. He looked like he knew something was up, but I couldn't care at the moment. I had passed yet another hurdle in my life and it felt like Christmas morning. I had confessed my feelings for Leah and she didn't reject me. She actually let me in. After my long shower I help Old Quil, and my dad set-up for the bonfire we were having tonight. I didn't complain not once about Paul who was sitting on his ass while we ran in and out the house and that had old Quil looking at me funny too. I just ignored them and whistled a tune in my head, reliving last night over and over in my head. When we were done I got dress and headed over to Leah's. Sue was coming out with arm full of bags.

"Let me get those for you, Sue." I said grabbing the bags and placing them on the truck. "You've got anything else you need help with?" I asked next, more than happy to help. I was on cloud fucking nine today the elder's better take advantage.

"Oh…well I guess you could help load the other stuff when it's done. Leah's making the macaroni and cheese, and the potato salad right now. I'm going to drop this over to your dad's." she said then looked at me as I nodded. "Did you and Leah both get into some laughing gas or something she can't stop smiling either. What's gotten into you two?" she asked.

I laughed it off. "I have no idea." I said as I retreated into the house.

I walked into the house my nose leading the way to the kitchen I could smell the Marconi in the oven and the potatoes boiling in a pot, but over everything else I could smell Leah. Her scent, which I could pick out 10 miles away, was much stronger to me now. The scent Vanilla and Rain flooded my senses sending my heart into over drive. I walked into the kitchen and wrapped my arms around her, inhaling into her hair, taking in more of her scent. My body hummed in satisfaction.

"I heard you couldn't stop smiling today." I murmured.

She laughed her head falling back onto my shoulder. "Yeah, what's it to you?" she said back.

"I'm just wondering if you're smiling for the same reason I am." I asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Doubt it, unless you're smiling because some hunky wolf told you that he likes you…a lot." She laughed as I turned her around and kissed her.

She wrapped her hands into my hair and curved her tongue around mine. I could already feel the excitement boiling inside me. My mind was already going there, half of it figuring out how much time we had until Sue would come back while the other half of it was imaging Leah, naked and on top of the kitchen table with her legs around my neck. God, I would kill to…

"Jacob" She said pulling back as she felt me stiffen into her thigh. I gave her a sheepish grin and she shook her head and turned around. She placed the oven down on low and sighed. "We've got 30 minutes" she said then took off down the hall. I ran and caught her at the stairs, smacking her butt. She yelped and giggled as she danced out my grip and up the stairs. "Don't dogs like to chase?" I heard her say as I scrambled up the stairs growling playfully. _Yes, yes we do_.

"What the fuck is going on here?" I voice roared causing both of us to freeze mid way up the stairs. She turned and her eyes widen almost in fear. I turned next to see Seth standing in the doorway with a half shocked half crazed look in his eyes.

"Did you just slap my sister's ass, Jake?" He asked stepping forward eyes focused on me.

I gulped and walked back down the steps. "Look Seth we should talk..." I said gently he looked mad enough to phase and we didn't need that right now.

"Oh like how you_ talk_ to my sister…" He growled looking at both of us for confirmation. I guess our silence was enough because he looked back at me with mad eyes. I could feel the heat coming off him. "I should've known you weren't coming around to help her." He said in disgust.

I took a step towards him. "It's not like that Seth, I know what you're thinking and you're wrong." I told him.

"Not like what, Jake? How could you use her like that? I trusted you and this is what you do. You broke her once I won't stand back and let you do it again." He growled, balling up his fist.

Suddenly I remembered the pain in my jaw the last time he was this pissed at me. The boy had a mean right hook and though I could take it, I wasn't to keen on experiencing it again. On top of that I didn't want to fight him, his was my best friend, like my little brother, and _her_ little brother and I couldn't hurt him even it was at the expense of me.

He took an advancing step forward and I braced myself for whatever was to come. I had tried to explain myself but he obviously had formed his own opinion on the matter.

"I can't believe I ever looked up to you." He growled shaking beyond the point of control.

"Seth, stop it." Leah said from behind me. I had almost forgotten she was here.

She had stayed quiet up until now. She moved from behind me to between Seth and me, placing a hand on his chest controlling him. I felt the fear lick down my spine as she did so I was afraid he'd phase so close to her. Once his shaking slowed I took a deep breath and stepped back.

"This is my fault." She whispered, confusing both of us. _How was any of this her fault_? "I've been dreading this moment because I knew I would have to come to terms with the fact that _I_ did this. If I was stronger when Sam-"

"Leah, no-" Seth began to say but she held her hand up to stop him.

"I haven't been the big sister I should be to you. I made you suffer right along with me with the whole Sam thing, then dad died and I got worse. I should've been there for you instead of you being there for me. It's my fault you feel like you have to protect me." She told him as he shook his head. "I'm so sorry you had to grow up so fast because I couldn't get over the pain. I'm sorry you feel the way you do about Sam and Jacob, you shouldn't. It was my load to carry and my problem to fix. The moment I stopped protecting you was the moment my wounds became yours and I'm sorry." She whispered.

Seth wrapped his arms around her and squeezed gently. "It's not your fault Lee. I'll always protect you. I'll always want what's best for you. I wouldn't want it any other way." He whispered.

They pulled apart and Leah took a deliberate step back and took my hand. Seth grimace but didn't look as angry as before. "This is different. I know it's hard to believe but I'm happy and it's because of him. So you have to trust me on this, and trust Jacob." She asked.

Seth raised a brow her statement, still looking like he needed some convincing. "Seth I'd die before I hurt her, before I'd be anything like Sam. You know I'm nothing like him. Besides…" I sighed and looked over to her. She wiped her red puffy eyes as she looked back at me with a small smile, I couldn't help but think how beautiful she was, how I had never seen anyone as beautiful as she was right now. "…it kills me when I'm not with her." I said realizing how unbelievably true that statement was. I would die without her.

I took my eyes off her for a second to see Seth sigh. "I don't really get a say in all this do I?" He asked, a small smile playing on his face.

"Nope" I said while Leah shook her head.

He rolled his eyes and sorted. "Fine then…" he said extending his hand out to me. I took it relived that it was all over. Next thing I knew I was on the ground again this time holding my groin. That fucker kneed me in the crotch! I groaned.

"SETH" Leah shrieked smacking him on the head as I looked up for an answer. _Why, Seth, why?_

"She's my sister and you're my best friend you should've asked me first. Guy code 101." He said with a shrug.

Leah laughed and punched him, then kissed his cheek. "Eww Lee, I know where your mouths been." He wiped his cheek.

I snickered as I got up gently and pulled her back to me as she turned into my chest. "Don't worry Seth it's only been on Jacob's mouth today." She said then clamped her hand over her mouth while Seth clamped his over his ears.

"God Leah, too soon waaaay too soon. As a matter of fact it'll never be a time when that comment is acceptable." He yelled as he walked out the house.

Once he was gone I wasted no time pulling her face to mine. "You just don't know how fucking incredible you are, do you?" I told her as I picked her up and captured her lips.

My dad's curious eyes were burning in the back of my head as I talked to Seth, Embry and Quil. Leah was leaning on me with her legs on Seth. Now that Seth knew neither of us really cared about keeping it a secret. It wasn't like we were hiding anything but we weren't shouting it to the world either. We just acted normal and let them figure it out if they could but every time I looked at my dad, his face let me know he had figured it out.

"I'm just saying Megan Fox is the hottest. Angelina can't compare." Embry argued.

"Oh come on she's got nothing on Olivia Wilde...now she's hot." Seth chimed in.

I just shook my head and looked at Leah and whispered in her ear. "No one compares to you" she giggled quietly and turned into me placing her lips on my neck for a second.

Suddenly I felt more than just my dad's eyes on us. I turned to see who it was. I snorted as I discovered Sam who was now shooting daggers straight at me with his eyes. His hand balled into a fist crushing a can of soda. _Well I guess the cat's out the bag now._ I shrugged and turned my attention back to the guys and Leah.

"Sam knows" I told her after awhile. She shrugged. "Oh well" she whispered with a grin. I relaxed into her and continued listening to the guys. If she wasn't worried then I wouldn't either.

The night went on with the usual stories then we ate like pigs, then when it was time to go I pulled Leah, who had fallen asleep, in my arms and headed to her place.

"Jacob, a word now." Sam hissed at me quietly.

I turned to him. "It's not the time, Sam. Besides I know what you're going to say and it's not necessary." I snarled but kept my voice down I didn't want to wake her up.

"You'll kill her, Jacob." he growled his voice louder than before. Leah shifted slightly in my arms causing me to growl at Sam.

"Sam…" My dad said rolling around to us. He placed himself between us both. "…Jacob's right it's not the time." He finished his voice reining with finality. Sam sighed and stomped away.

"Dad, I-" I began to explain but he held up his hand.

"We'll talk about it tomorrow, I figure you're not coming home tonight anyways." he grinned a little and then rolled on. I just shook my head and carried Leah back to my car and drove us to Sue's.

She finally opened her eyes, smiling at the soft touches I began to plant on her stomach. "Where have you been?" I grumbled.

She rolled her eyes. "Sleep." she grinned. "I had a great dream."

"Did you dream about me?" I asked.

She sighed. "Always... you annoy me just the same though." she laughed.

I kissed her stomach. "You know if I didn't know how insanely crazy you are about me, I'd be insulted." I laughed.

"Do you dream of me?" she asked sitting up and scooting over so I could get in next to her. I crawled up to her. "Always...but the real you is much better." I grinned.

We both lay back down on our backs staring at the blank ceiling and sighed letting the silence hold us.

"Are you still tired?" I asked breaking the silence when I heard her yawn. I felt her nod against me.

"Patrol wiped me out and I have patrol again tomorrow morning, I'm never taking Quil's shift again." she grumbled.

"Let me know before you go ok...I'm not too trusting of Sam right now." I told her, remembering that Sam knew about us and probably couldn't wait to get Leah alone to… She rolled over to face me, stopping all thoughts that were going through my head.

"You're trying to protect me... that's cute Jake but I can handle myself." She rolled her eyes.

I sighed. "He knows and he'll stop at nothing to convince you that I'm going to hurt you, like he did." My voice lowered at the end.

"It'll be fine. I'm not afraid of Sam." She told me with a smile.

"That I know." I chuckled then sighed in defeat. I knew she could take care of her self and I knew there was no fighting with her on this.

She kissed me one more time before settling in and relaxing. I relaxed but instead of falling asleep I watched her sleep. She looked so peaceful and happy and it really felt good that I was the reason she was like this, it felt fucking great. I laughed quietly as I stroked her face softly. _How in the world did I end up here? How did I end up falling for Leah?_ I mean we hated each other when she first joined the pack. She was always pushing my buttons and I always pushed back, unlike the rest of the pack who just got out her way when she was on her rampage. None of us wanted to deal with her pain, me especially. Maybe I just didn't want to know what I was going to go through. Deep down inside I knew Bella was going to hurt me, but I still pressed on, pushed her to see it too. I should've... I sighed. Should've, would've, could've but didn't that's what Leah would say. She gave me the tools to face what had happened. I faced it, I dealt with it and when I was free from Bella I found Leah. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen this before, seen her for all she was. She was strong, beautiful, gorgeous, fun, alive, complicated, impossible, argumentative, stubborn, loving, and smart; she was everything I never knew I wanted. She was what I wanted...forever.

I walked home after making sure Sam was not on with Leah. She kept trying to tell me nothing would happen but I had a bad feeling about it. I would probably not sleep until after she was off and safely back in my arms. My dad was there waiting, ready for this talk. I rolled my eyes and sat down at the table knowing I wouldn't be able to get away with not having this conversation.

"So you and Leah huh?" he started off. I nodded. "Sam's not too happy about it is he..." he said.

I growled under my breath. "That son of a bitch better stay away from her." I yelled, it shocked me and him. "Sorry" I quickly said.

"You have strong feelings for her?" he asked. I nodded again. "And you're sure it's not just _sexual_ feelings?" he said cautiously.

I groaned. "No Dad...I think I love her." I said shocking myself probably more than him.

He raised a brow. "How does she feel about all of this?" he asked. I sighed.

"She feels the same...she just hasn't said those exact words yet." I told him, hell I hadn't said those exact words yet until now.

"How did all this happen? "He asked.

I sighed and explained everything. Reliving every moment as it came out my mouth. I explained how broken we both were and how we fixed each other, how we helped each other heal. I explained how one day I went from loving Bella to loving Leah. I went from not breathing to breathing in Leah and Leah only. I didn't know how it happened I just know that it did and it had changed me. He listened carefully and by the time I was done he was smiling so hard I thought his teeth would fall out. I could understand it sort of he had always been a second father to Leah as Harry had been to me. Then he called old Quil and Sue over to discuss it. Sue was pretty shocked that I and Leah were together but she wasn't against it, anything that could make her daughter smile was ok to her.

I breathed a sigh of relief when Sue gave me her approval. "Ok so can I go get her now?" I said as I got out my seat. I couldn't wait to tell her that her mom and my dad knew and both were fine about it. I turned to see my dad and Old Quil exchange a loaded look that got me curious. "What?" I asked them. Old Quil took a deep breath. "Son, I think you should sit back down." He said. I gulped and did so. Old Quil sat next to me and started talking. He was guarded, almost apologetic as he spoke and I quickly found out why. I sighed and shook my head when he was done. _As if this day could be more complicated_.

I was there on her porch when she got home. She was happy to see me of course but one look at my face and she knew something was up. I kept her calm enough to get her in the house and up to her room, and then I told her everything, everything they told me. She stayed still in shock as she listened. I wasn't sure if it meant anything to her right now, I wasn't sure if she even processed the words. I finished and waited for her reaction.

"So they think we are…soul mates." she asked almost too shocked to even say it. I nodded.

"The reason why we didn't imprint is because we're both wolves...wolves can't imprint on each other." I told her.

She snorted. "And you believe it, don't you?" she asked.

"I'm starting to, the more I look back on it all the more I believe it. Leah you have no idea how strong my feelings for you are and they came so quickly. I know I can't have a life without you, and I don't want one." I said firmly.

She shook her head. "Jake..." she sighed placed her hands on my chest. "I just, I want...ugh" she huffed in frustration. "I've never been so happy than I am right now with you but I'm not sure if we're ready for all of this. I mean with Bella and Sam and the pack...I'm just not sure about the whole soul mates thing and I'm afraid that if I believe it one day..." she looked down in shame.

"One day it'll all crash and burn?" I guessed

She nodded and looked back up to me, tears in her eyes. I hadn't seen this much pain from her in a long time. The way she looked at me took me back to the day at the cliffs when I said those horrible things to her. It broke my heart to see her like that again. "I can't go through that again Jake I just...can't." she cried reaching for me. I held her into my chest and let her sob. I couldn't say anything because in all honestly I didn't want to hurt her, I had seen the depths of her pain and I never wanted to be the cause of something like that. I never wanted to be the reason she cried.

**Leah's POV**

I watched from my bedroom window as Jake walk to the trees surrounding my home and phased. I felt my breath escape me as I watched him turn into that beautiful russet wolf I had come to really care for. I actually couldn't see my future without Jake in it and with this new information I was beginning to fear that future.

I felt so trapped by the circumstances. I wanted to believe him I wanted to believe I had someone in my life that I could call my own but it seemed all too good to be true. Ever since Sam left I had truly believed I would never be happy again and even when things got better with Jake being around I still didn't trust it stay.

Everything had been temporary up until now, Sam, Emily, my father, and mother. All those relationships were either no more or completely strained. One thing I learned very quickly in life was that nothing last forever.

I wasn't sure if I could trust my feelings anymore they had gotten me into enough trouble over the years, but to ignore them completely was something I couldn't do. I couldn't ignore that stupid squeeze on my heart every time we made love, I couldn't ignore the butterflies I felt when I woke up next to him, how I felt when he looked at me. He had curled into my system in a good way, chased the ghost that had once haunted my every step. He had given me peace in the darkest of times. I had gone into this thing with Jacob blind, solely going on feelings and now I had no choice but to think about what we were and where we were going because he had dropped this bomb in my lap.

I groaned and turned to my bed, flopping down on it. _Soulmates...did he really think we were soulmates?_ I shook my head. "Like hell" I muttered quietly.

_But..._ My mind just had to go there. _What if we were?_ It would make sense...why he hadn't imprinted? How we got so close after we got over the pain, why I felt this pull towards him like I was missing something I never knew was there until he came along and filled it all up. I looked back on the past few months like he said and I saw what he saw. Back then I didn't even think I had a soul now I was actually wavering on the thought that I had a soulmate.

Jacob had done this to me, he helped me get back parts of me that had been taken away or changed by the events in my life. I knew I would never be the girl I used to be, but now I was starting think that I was better than before and it was because of him. I couldn't imagine what I would be if he hadn't come along. He was right about one thing: I'd die without him. I didn't think it was possible to feel this way again after Sam but it happened and over the course of a couple months! I couldn't imagine fate, stupid cursed fate, had actually giving something back to me. After all it had taken from me. Maybe this was my gift_,_ the gift of choice. The best thing about Jake and I was that we choose each other no one had put their magic spell on us and for me it was so important to have this choice after all the rest of my choices had been taken away from me.

Choice was a thing we wolves rarely got to experience and out of all the choices that were made for me I was happy to get this one back, this was the important one. So now I had to make it. I could choose to let the fear get to me, let the past control me, and push Jacob out my life. Or I could embrace my future, leave the fear and the past behind and move forward with my life with Jacob. My heart sputtered as I mauled that one over realizing I had already made this decision. I had made my choice when I choose to talk to Jacob on the cliffs, when I let him into my bed after I'd woken up, when I blocked Sam's name off my finger, when I didn't shut him out after we first had sex, when I agreed to be with him just 2 nights ago. Every time I reached out to him for help, and took his hand when he needed help I was stepping closer and closer to my soulmate and further away from a past that had pulled me into darkness. I had let Jacob into my bed, my heart and my soul now there was no turning back, the decision had already been made.

Before I knew what I was doing I was heading out my room and outside towards Jacob's. I couldn't let him think that I wasn't sure about him or us for that matter. I needed him, I wanted him and whatever happened next, soulmates or not, I had already chosen him.

**Jacob's POV**

I stayed away from Leah for the rest of the day, letting her process everything that was going on, giving her the space she needed. I sat on my bed for about an hour realizing how life sucked without her I was hoping that I didn't have to use to the idea, life without Leah. I shuddered at the thought then got up. I needed to do something keep my mind busy; distract myself from the fear of what might happen next. She could shut me out like she did Sam. I thought then slammed the door of my room in anger. _No, Jake don't think like that. _I told myself as I headed outside.

I headed to the garage thinking that if I could keep my heads busy maybe my mind would follow suit. I opened the door and growled at the man in front of me.

"You need to get off my land, Uley." I told him, but he made no attempt to move, none at all so I stepped up to him.

"I don't take orders from a pup." he crossed his arms, showing no fear.

I growled. _Smug son of a bitch_. "What do you want? And if it's about Leah you need to mind your own damn business." I said already knowing why he was here. I really didn't know why he was so upset about it, he had lost Leah a long time ago and now she was mine and I wasn't stupid enough to let her go that easily.

He sighed. "You think you were meant for her, don't you?" he said.

"Like I said none of your business, Sam." I repeated myself then actually processed his words. "How long have you known?" I asked, my anger temporally leaving me in light of this new information. I couldn't believe he knew and never told her. _How much pain could he have saved her from?_

He sighed. "…since she phased. They started talking it and…" he sighed and looked down. "It can't be proven. Are you really willing to take that risk because of what _they_ think? What if you imprint, Jacob? You know what she went through already you want to make her go through all of that again?" he asked. My expression softened slightly and he raised a brow. "You really do love her, don't you?" he whispered.

I nodded. "I don't know how it all happened so quickly but she's everything, Sam. I feel like I'm choking without her..." I sighed heavily. "But I don't want to be you... I don't want to pull her into that darkness again. I never want to be the reason she cries at night, screams because she wakes up and it's all real..."

Sam held his hand up to stop me. _He still couldn't face it, the coward._ "You'll stop seeing her then?" he concluded.

I sighed and took a minute to really think about it. "No" I finally answered. "I won't make the choice for her, like you did. If she wants to stop then I'll do it but I won't leave her without a choice." I told him firmly.

He growled and looked like he was about to say something when he looked to the side of me. I turned to see her, Leah standing there. _I wonder how long she had been there_. By the looks of her face, I'd say enough to know what was going on.

Leah walked up to me and laced her fingers in mine. "This is my choice, Sam." She whispered.

I couldn't help but grin a little. _She picked me, she picked me._ I sang in a kid voice in my head.

Sam grimaced and I had to fight the urge to stick my tongue out at him. "I don't want you hurt again, Leah. I'm just looking out for you." he explained.

She nodded and sighed. "I get it but…I make my own choices now." she told him and tugged me out the door with her, leaving Sam there alone. Once we were out his sight I relaxed and I wrapped my arm around her waist and kissed her forehead. "Thank you." I whispered.

**Leah's POV**

We walked to a place that held much history for us; the cliffs. It had become our spot in so many ways. He sat down draping his legs over to edge as I leaned against him tucking my legs underneath me. I sighed contently at the blissful peace surrounding us. No sound but the wind and waves crashing below. Jake looked in deep thought probably trying to figure out what had changed my mind so quickly, or maybe he was thinking about where we go from here. 2 days ago we had taken a step and now were taking an even bigger step. If I was going to embrace this then it meant forever not just present but future. My heart picked up at the thought, I had been here before and if this turned out to be wrong and he imprinted like Sam I wouldn't know how to stomach it all. If it happened this time there wouldn't be a Jake there to help me through the pain. I sighed and looked over to him. So many memories played through my head some recent, some old, some good, some bad but in the end they all made me love him more. They all made me realize that _this_ time I knew the risk but I still felt like jumping.

He placed his arm around me and squeezed my shoulder. "I can't express how overwhelmed I feel at the moment." He stated with a small chuckle. "I can't believe you choose me, I can't believe that you want to be stuck with me for the rest of your life, cuz you know that's what this is right...its forever." He said looking me in the eye, searching for some kind of emotion.

I nodded. "If I have to be stuck with someone the rest of my life..." I rolled my eyes and laughed. "...then I want it to be with someone who makes me happy, even when I'm sad or angry or pissed off I'm still happy. You're it Jake your the only one who can make me happy. I choose you." I whispered.

He smiled and brought his lips down to mine. His lips soft yet direct met mine and I felt it all click into place. I finally felt like I belonged. This supernatural world felt right now that I had the right person by my side.

* * *

**A/N: Ok so I had some trouble with this one, changed it about 5 times so I hope you like it. Sorry it's been so long between updates I promise the next won't be so long. NEways thanks so very, very much to my reviewers/subscribers love you all and you are the reason I continue to push myself with this story. *Kisses* **

**Oh and my heart goes out to Wolfpack member Bronson Pelletier who was attacked early this week by some drunken assholes...Get well soon!**

**Have a Happy Turkey Day Everyone!**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I own nothing as oppose to I know nothing (my mistake from Chp 7 HAHA!)**

Jacob's POV

Waking up next to Leah, the next day, I felt accomplished like I had done something in my life, something to be proud of. I guess in a way it was an accomplishment. I thought, 3 months ago, that I'd never love anyone again, I thought I'd never put myself out there just to be stepped on again. After having done that with Bella and the results that followed I was done with it all. But this was different because at least I knew Leah had gone through what I had, worse even, and I knew she felt as I did: scared, lonely, and betrayed. But she didn't look scared anymore, when she found me and told Sam that she had choose me she didn't look scared she was sure and if she was sure after all that had happened to her I knew I was sure about her.

I'll admit it was a little weird waking up together and not having to be quiet as we said our hellos, played around in her bed before going downstairs. I almost, out of habit, went for the window but she shook her head and took my hand to tow me out her room. She and I walked to the kitchen sat down at the table and Leah started her usual conversation with her mom and Seth while I sat there trying to dodge Seth's glares. _Would he ever get over it? _He grumbled the entire time but Sue was as happy as I had seen her since before Harry past.

It did get a little weird when Embry and Quil showed up. I tried to act normal for Embry's sake, he still didn't know, and I didn't want to shock him too much, but when Leah went upstairs to shower and I needed to head out for patrol, Embry was completely forgotten about when I kissed her goodbye. She threw herself into the kiss and then pulled away and ran up the stairs before I could get the chance to make a second move on her. I made an attempt to follow her but Sue reminded me I had patrol, a warning in her eyes. I laughed it off and turned for the door when I saw Embry standing there mouth wide open.

"Surprise" Quil shouted and laughed. Seth rolled his eyes and headed out with me, Quil and Embry.

It didn't take long, as I expected, for him to recover and begin drilling me. "Why am I always the last to know?" Embry said coming to my side.

I shrugged. "I wasn't purposely trying to exclude you, Em. It just happened but yes Leah and I are together now, have been for awhile." I told him proudly.

"How did you swing that, man?" He asked, a cheesy grin playing on his lips. I rolled my eyes. He made it sound like a game I had feeling he didn't know how serious it was between us.

"Don't know but I'm glad it happened." I smiled cheesily right back at him. I couldn't really hide how glad I was that she was in my life now.

He looked at me and groaned. "Don't tell me you…you didn't… Damn Jake could you like a girl for once and not fall in love with her. This is about to be Bella all over again man." He said causing Quil to stop laughing and look at me. Seth looked over to me too with a curious eye.

I took a deep breath, I didn't really want to discuss this with them when I hadn't even said it to Leah but didn't really seem like I had a choice. "This is different. It's more than Bella, more than anything. I love her and I'll never love anyone like I love Leah." I told them confidently.

Embry and Quill rolled their eyes muttering something like here we go again but Seth he actually looked convinced. I was hoping now he would lay off a little.

"That's all fine and dandy Jake but, I think you're forgetting one tiny detail." Embry said. I raised a brow.

_What detail?_ Our parents knew, Sam knew, Seth knew, and were all ok with it somewhat. Leah was ok with everything fully accepting the idea that we're are soulmates and are meant to be together. _What was I missing?_

"Bella, her wedding, and the fact that she wants to be a leech; therefore breaking treaty and making her your enemy. How are you and Leah going to handle that?" He questioned causing me to stop in my tracks.

_Shit, I had forgotten about that._

Leah's POV

Lying on bed reading an old English book, trying to keep my mind occupied, trying not to wonder where a certain person was I realize how badly I need a life. A life that doesn't revolve around him because I'm completely bored and moody when he's not around. Even I don't like how I am. Ugh I hate how happy he makes me. It makes the time apart miserable. On the bright side we didn't have to hide anymore which was a relief in some ways like he no longer had to sneak in my room by going up the tree but I kind of missed the secrecy of it all, now I feel like everyone watching, judging us, waiting for me to screw it up because of course Jake, being the model of perfection, can do no wrong. I huffed and threw the book on the floor turning over to face the ceiling. That's when I realized I was being watched. I jumped up in surprise, releasing a pansy shriek that was so not like me.

"You dipshit how long were you standing there?" I yelled at Jacob who was now doubled over laughing.

Giving him my unamused face Jacob finally stops laughing and collects himself. "For a minute there I thought you'd never notice." He laughs some more. _I hate him sometimes_. "Oh come on you know if the situation was reverse you'd be laughing too...but if it would make you feel better..." He says and strolls over to me intertwining our hands and kissing my knuckles. "I'm sorry babe" he whispers, his face now so close I could feel the heat coming off him. I tried to control my heart, steady my breath and keep up my unamused face but he was just too good and the fact that I had been thinking about him didn't help.

Reluctantly I relaxed into him and inhaled his earthy scent. "I hate to admit it but that did make me feel better" I grumbled into his chest. My body began to shake with his as he laughs.

"What were you doing that got you so upset? You know before I scared you." He says big dumb grin on his face.

"You didn't scare me... And not to inflate your ego but I was thinking about you." I tell him as I lie down on the bed, urging him to lie next to me.

"So I'm reason you threw the book?" He asked curiously.

"Yeah...no…it's just I feel like I don't have a life without now and not that I don't mind but when you're not around I'm unbelievably bored." I tell him feigning the dramatics.

He laughs and I punch him in the ribs. "I feel the same way. One patrol without you and Em and Quil are ready to bite my head off. I kept thinking about where you were, when I would see you, if you were thinking about me. They say I sound like an imprinted wolf." He laughs at the end as I roll my eyes. "But I have a plan to counteract all of that..." He says pushing himself up and on top of me. My body automatically responds to his advances as I place my hands around his neck, wrapping one of my legs around his to bring him closer to me. "...we never separate. How bout that?" He whispered his lips dangerously close to mine.

"Hmmm?" I whispered completely forgetting what brought us here. Before he could answer me I moved my lips and connected us.

What began slow, warm, and smooth turned fast, hot, and rough within seconds. Before I knew it the clothes were off, shoes were tossed in the corner and whatever was on my bed was scattered on the floor. If being with Jacob felt this good then I never wanted to be without him.

* * *

"So how do you like the plan?" I could hear him panting in my ear.

"What plan?" I panted back, now that I was coming down from my high I could actually feel things outside of the tingling sensation left over from the last orgasm. I felt sore but not in a bad way, this was a price I'd willingly pay for the bliss Jacob had just given to me.

"Before this..." He said rubbing his hand over my breast pinching at my nipple. I groaned in satisfaction, opening my legs invitingly. He laughs at my reaction. "...before we got here I said that we shouldn't be apart, that's how we keep ourselves from being bored." He wagged his brows at me.

"So what are we suppose to do stay in my room and hump like rabbits." I laugh as I roll over to face him. "Sounds fine to me but I mean you have to get back to school and I have to..." He kissed me to stop me.

"I don't care about any of that I just...as long as were together, ok? As long as were together." He said his eyes meeting mine. He always had this look in his eyes when he looked at me. Something about it would get my blood plumping, my heart racing, and make me feel butterflies. Something about his eyes made me forget everything, everything that could go wrong, and everything that already had. There was something about his eyes.

"Yeah I like that plan." I whispered leaning into him for another kiss. Even though I was sore I was hoping this would lead to round three.

"Lee, I have a flavor to ask of you." He whispered against my lips as he pulled away.

I didn't really care about what he had to say, his hard dick pressing against my thigh had me too distracted. "Whatever it is I'll do it. Just shut up and fuck me." I said biting down onto his bottom lip.

"So you agree to go to Bella's wedding with me." He said back.

At first I thought I didn't hear him right, but there was no way I got that wrong with my super hearing and the fact that we were practically breathing in each others mouths, not to mention the dead serious look he had on his face. I pulled back, sex buzz completely gone, and took a deep breath. I couldn't even ask if he was joking because he looked like he always did when she was brought up in conversations.

"I thought you weren't going." I said rolling myself out of bed, taking the sheet with me.

"I wasn't but I thought that it would be better if I did, and you came with me as support." He said from behind me.

I shook my head and sat on my window pane looking out towards the rain. I didn't want to go, he knew that, not just because it would be a house full of my enemies and my nose would burn like hell, but also because she was his first love someone I felt I still had to fight with sometimes to keep him with me. And I didn't want to see her hurt him again because there was no way this wedding wouldn't cut him deep regardless of what was going on with us.

"Leah, I want say goodbye. Close that door and move on…with you." He said now standing behind me and rubbing my arm.

I didn't look at him because I knew what I would see. I just thought about his words and what they meant. In all actuality what he was doing was the right thing to do and soon I would have to do the same at Sam's wedding but sometimes doing the right just sucked. After about a minute of thinking it over I groaned and pulled away from him; walking over to my scattered clothes to find my cell phone.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

I rolled my eyes as if it was obvious. "Calling Rach, I'm going to need a dress." I told him with a small smile.

He grinned and walked over to hug me. "Thank you." He whispered.

"You'll just owe me one now." I laughed at little, hugging him back. As much as I wanted to revert to the old Leah and tell him to fuck off, I couldn't bring myself to do it, as easy as it would've been, I couldn't let him face it alone.

* * *

As I browsed through the rack of clothing, aimlessly, I couldn't keep my focus. There were too many noises and smells swirling around me. _This is why I hate shopping._ Rachel was humming as she flipped through the rack occasionally grabbing something off the hanger and draping it around her arm.

"Oh come on Leah you have nothing to try on and we've been here 20 minutes already. You need a dress darling." she tsked. She was too happy to have some girl time, sadly I couldn't say the same. I rather be swapping spit, sweat, and other body fluids with her brother.

I stifled my laugh and turned to her. "Yeah well I'm no good at this...so" I grumbled flipping through the hangers aggressively.

Rachel laughed and came over to my side. "It's shopping Lee, how could you not be good at it?" she joked and found a couple dresses and slung them into my arms. "Ok, these will do. Come on." she tugged to me to the fitting room as I rolled my eyes.

I tried on the red one first, hoping it would be it and I wouldn't have to try anything else on, plus I always liked the color red on me. The dress slipped on with a little bit a difficulty but it wasn't too bad. I managed to get the side zipper all the way up without much trouble and then I turned in the mirror. This was the dress, I knew it wouldn't take much, if any, convincing for Rachel to approve.

"Lee, get your butt out here." Rachel said from the other side.

I cleared my throat and opened the door with a grin, I knew my smile would help sale the dress. She gasped when she saw me and pulled me to the bigger mirror.

"I'm so jealous." she said in a laugh.

"It's not that good, Rach." I told her. She tugged at my arm to turn around. The back was intricate, criss-crossing but not too much and the banded dress did wonders to my ass. _Ok, now I see her point._ Personally the back view was better than the front.

"And we have to do is get you a bra to go with the dress, you know to show off that wonderful rack of yours." she winked.

I rolled my eyes again and then went back into the fitting room to change out the dress, my dress for Bella Swan's wedding.

After stopping at Frederick's of Hollywood for my bra we made our way back home. "Ugh, I can't believe I let Jake talk me into going." I grumbled, thinking about tomorrow's dreadful day. I couldn't remember how we went from not going to us both going with Billy, Seth _and_ my mom.

"He'll need you to be there." Rachel said in a flat voice, it was like a broken record I had been complaining relentlessly all day. I sighed and nodded, yeah I knew that was true but I really didn't want to go to stink manner. "Do you think he'll keep it together?" She asked me.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure if I will..." I laughed, the image of me slapping the bitch flashed through my mind. "…and if it were me going to Sam's wedding I'm sure I wouldn't either." I sighed, thinking of how I'll be when Sam and Emily get married. I cringed at the idea. "We're a messed up pair, aren't we?" I sighed.

"Yeah well when you loose it all your a lot more grateful for the things you get back. I think when the dust clears you two well be perfect for each other." she grinned.

I huffed a little at her positive view of everything in the world, jealous that I couldn't be more like that. She dropped me off at my house and I went inside took a long bath to whine down from the long day I had and to mentally prepare myself for tomorrow.

My mother woke me the next morning and as reluctant as I was for the day I got up with no complaints and started getting ready. Today I needed to be there for Jacob, today wasn't about me. After Rachel came over and did my hair and make-up I put on my dress and heels. I looked in my mirror and smiled. I actually looked like a lady. I wondered what Jacob would think when he saw me in this. Probably he'd want to skip the wedding altogether and do something else with me that involved a lot of screaming, and moaning, and sweating. I clinched my legs together at the thought.

I walked down the stairs and spotted Jake, his back to me looking out the window. My mom and brother were there too sitting on the couch with Billy. My mom's jaw dropped and Seth grinned as he smacked Jake on the back. Jacob turned and I held my breath. He had on some dark slacks and a dark blue button up, he looked delicious. He spotted me and his breathing stopped too. He drank me up making me feel almost self-conscious then he licked his lips.

"Damn, Jake you going to eat her." Paul said snapping him and me out of the trance he had us in. _What the hell was he doing here anyways?_

Jacob nodded as he strolled over to me, still looking quite spellbound. "Let's not go to the wedding, eh?" he raised his brows still looking over me in a way that was overheating my body.

"I knew you would say that." I smiled, leaning into him.

He laughed a little. "I'm thinking of the bride here, Leah. You're going to still the spotlight. You look..." he crumpled his brow and shook his head. "...amazing, breathtaking, beautiful. Lee, I can't breathe. I'm lucky I can see or move right now." he told me grazing my arm slightly.

I shivered and he took advantage of my distraction going into my lips. I wrapped my arms around him throwing myself into the kiss, we both were greedy and extremely turned on. I wasn't sure if it was possible to stop now.

"Ok, enough sucking face guys I'm going to puke." Paul said.

We ignored him. "Oh let them go on I'm looking forward to having some grandbabies to spoil." Billy laughed.

That was enough to get me to stop. I pulled away and stepped back. "Yeah, lets go." I sighed and pulled Jacob out the door.

* * *

We managed to get through the wedding without any incidents. It was uncomfortable to be polite to people let alone leeches but I sucked it up with a smile. Jacob however looked out of it, I think he was trying to control his temper but he made no contact with anyone during the wedding ceremony.

Now we were at the reception, in line to congratulate the happy couple. _Oh joy_. I rolled my eyes as we proceed through back yard.

"You ok to do this?" I asked him as I spotted Bella and the leech. He sighed and nodded, with his battle face on. "Ok" I said in an unsure voice_. He's going to maul the girl_.

We stood in line as Billy and my mom had said their polite congrats and Seth was next. Seth patted the leech on the back and then hugged Bella. _I swear there's no way we're related_. Then he went over to my mom turning to observe Jake and me. I took a deep breath and pulled Jake along. I nodded to the leech but my focus was on Jacob. I couldn't remember the last time he looked that much in pain. I hate that this was killing him. I let his arm go and he extended it out to her. She took it but looked hurt and confused.

"Bells…I hope you got what you wanted. Goodbye." he whispered before letting go and towing me along. We went over to our parents and Jacob sighed, his eyes burning holes into the happy couple's skulls.

"You want to go?" I asked and he nodded fervently. We left Seth, mom and Billy there and went around to the front, got in the car and drove off.

It didn't take long for the little rabbit to hit 80 as Jacob began taking his fustrations out on the road. _Shit, I knew I should've drove._

He hit a turn and I flew into the passager side window. _Ok, I've had enough._ "Jake please slow down. You're scaring me." I told him.

He stomped on the brakes putting one hand on my chest to keep me from flying into the dash.

"I'm sorry." he said, his breathing labored, mine was too so I took awhile to say anything back.

"You ok, now? I know it wasn't easy." I asked.

He closed his eyes and nodded. "I just thought about the fact that they'll turn her and we'll have to kill them...them including her too. That was the last time I would ever see her human." he breathed.

I sighed and rubbed his arm. "You did well. You didn't loose your cool not once. I'm proud of you" I told him hoping to brighten his spirits.

"It was all because of you, Lee. You gave me the strength." he took my hand and placed it on his cheek. I rubbed it softly and placed my forehead on his.

"We'll be just fine Jake, I promise." I assured him. Whatever was next we would get through it together.


	9. Chapter 9

**Ok here is the long awaited chp 9 I'm sorry it took so long I've been a crazy person about this chp and I wanted to get it right resulting in a multiple versions and a whole lot of editing. I really hope you like this chp and I won't make any promises but i hope to have the next one up soon. Thanx to all my reviewers, subscribers, and readers you guys are the best. **

**I own nothing of course :'(**

* * *

**Leah POV**

It was as though nothing had happened two weeks ago. School started and Jacob and the rest of the boys went back, unwillingly. Patrols were normal except for the fact that only three of us (Jared, Sam and I) were doing them during the daytime while the others were in school. I could tell that whatever was to happen with Bella would be dealt with when it came up. No one, especially Jacob, mentioned her anymore. It was as though she was just a nightmare and we had all woken up from it. I wish it was that way for me. The affects of her and the leech's presence still lingered in my mind. I tried to get comfortable with the way things were now, my summer of discovery and romance now gone, but I just couldn't do it. Some stupid part of my mind still wondered if I had been dreaming this whole time. Everyday I would wake up and look to my right and be surprised that Jacob was sleeping next to me. I never expected him to stay even though he had made it clear that he wasn't going anywhere. I guess the damage had been done. Even though I was over Sam, over that horrible part of my life, my mind and body still felt the lasting affects of everything. I couldn't get comfortable no matter how hard I tried.

After another morning passing with no news of Bella's return from her honeymoon I trotted downstairs to the kitchen to make Jake, Seth, and I breakfast. My mom had now handed off those duties to me seeing as how I didn't have a job and the fact that my boyfriend was practically living here now that Rachel and Paul had shacked up in Billy's house. _Poor Billy._ This was our routine since school started and I was hoping it would be for a while. I don't think any girl in the world would mind waking up to Jacob Black every morning. I laughed a little to myself as I flipped the French toast in the skillet.

"So…" My mom said announcing herself into the kitchen in her usual fashion. "…I think you and Jacob should get your own place." She said. I dropped the spatula in response. _What the hell? When did she come up with that idea?_

"Wh-" I mumbled out trying to make sense of her words. Was this her subtle way of telling me I was too old to live at home or was this her not too subtle way of pushing Jacob and me closer together? My bet was on the latter.

"I just think you two should start building your lives together and the first step is a house of your own." She smiled. _Yup, bingo I was right_. I turned back to my food ignoring her. "You should at least think about it." She proposed trying another way around. Over the years she had become crafty with her approaches, the direct way usually wasn't the best way.

I snorted and picked up the spatula to clean it off. I would think about it, of course she had thrown it out there, but I doubt any part of me thought we were ready to live together on our own. Jacob and Seth bonded the stairs and I shot my mom a look but she had her own plans and if she couldn't get through me, direct or indirect, she would go through Jacob. _Crafty little…_

"Jacob, I was just telling Leah that you two should move into the mother-in-law out back." She said ignoring my red face. _I'm going to kill her._ She had omitted the fact that she had already decided as to where we would stay. Details weren't as important to me as they were to Jacob, she knew that and she was using it against me to paint a lovely picture inside his mind. You know one where the world was right and good and innocent, one where there was no such thing as heartbreak or betrayal. Jacob might have momentarily forgotten that but I hadn't.

Starry eyed Jacob turned to me with a smile. _Shit, this won't end well_. "What do you think, Lee?" he asked hopeful eyes and all.

I looked at my mother, who was grinning ear to ear thinking that she had me, and then back at Jacob. I felt cornered, trapped, and most of all I felt hopeless. If I didn't want to live with Jacob after all that had happened this summer then when would I want to live with him? I guess I took too long to answer because Jacob's smile faded.

"It's ok it's too soon but thank you, Sue, for offering." He said as I turned away and finished breakfast. _How many times would I fail Jacob and how long would it take for him to realize that I would always be a disappointment_?

After breakfast the boys were suppose to go to school but Jake stayed behind. Breakfast was awkward and silent so in true Jacob fashion he wasn't going to wait long to fix it. I sat on the stairs as I watch Seth leave for school, dreading the conversation to come as Jacob lingered in the doorway. "It's too soon, you know that." I told him once Seth was out of earshot.

He sat next to me with a sigh. "No, I don't. I mean, I guess it's seems to be moving too fast but it's not like things are going to change between us." His voice lingered like he had something else to say. "It's normal for..."

I snorted at his comment, his assumption. "Normal? What part of this is normal? Normal people don't turn into wolves, Jake? Normal couples don't have imprinting and leeches to worry about. We're not normal. I'm not normal." I went from a whisper to damn near screaming at him. He looked at me with wide eyes. I stood up and started pacing the porch. "Normal people don't get dumped and their whole outcome of life flips around. Normal people don't...I wanted to be normal but it didn't work. I was everything he could've asked for and he still left. He has no fear, no consequences, no lingering memories, but that's all I have. So what trust could I have in this working?" I said gesturing back and forth between us as he stood and leaned against the post. "Tell me Jake, tell me why you think we can beat the odds, and tell me why you'll never leave." I yelled closing the space. I really don't know why these insecurities were coming out now. I had agreed to be with him, even knowing the risk, so why was I questioning it now? Maybe moving in meant more to me than it should have. Moving in meant that Jake and I would be taking a big step, a step Sam and I never got to take. Maybe that's why I was so against it. I looked back up to Jacob, who had stayed quiet during my inner monologue, and was now looking at me in that intense way he always did. My heart sped up.

He didn't hesitant and I saw nothing but determination in his eyes. "I love you." He said looking me dead in the eyes. "That's why I know it will work. Because I won't give up on you, because I'll never stop loving you. I'll never leave, I promise. I love you." He whispered against my lips.

I replayed his words again and again thinking that maybe I didn't hear him right, but as he stared at me I knew I had. Upon realizing what he said I cried, of course, he had brought the tears on more than one occasion and now they just flowed freely, when I was around him. Jacob Black was too good to be true, he was a dream. He was some kind of wonderful, this man, and I couldn't get away from the hold he had on me. I closed the gap, smashing our lips together aggressively. I couldn't believe how much had changed in one single conversation.

Pulling away slightly to get some air, Jacob cupped my face softly and kissed my lips gently once more. I took a breath and shook my head. "I hate you" I mumbled into his mouth causing Jacob to laugh as he went in for another kiss.

* * *

"Skipping school is definitely worth it." Jacob laughed, shaking me in the process. I kissed him between his shoulder blades then continued to rub his back.

"You don't say" I said back. This morning had started off stressful with the whole living together stuff but after Jake's confession I was open to idea of Jake and me living together. With no patrol or school today it felt like the summer again; just me, Jake, and my bed. _Maybe everyday could be like this…yeah right._ "I wish everyday was like this." I sighed, leaning down to place my chest flat against his back.

"Me too, another reason why I hate school: It keeps us apart." Jacob muttered. We stayed like that for awhile just relaxing into each other until Jacob rolled us over so now he was on top. "So when are we moving?" he grinned.

I rolled my eyes. He knew he had me but did he have to rub it in. "Whenever you want." I rescinded with a small growl pinching his nipple.

He smacked my hand away and I laughed. "Oh so how bout I pinch your nipples." He smirked, his hand teasingly hovering over my breast. I bit my lip in response. He pinched watching my reaction; I groaned and arched up to him.

He dipped down and licked my nipple.

"Mmmm Jake." I moaned out, pressing my core against his hardening dick.

He hissed in response. "If you keep it up I'm never going back to school." He said as he nipped at the base of my neck. I gasped and closed my eyes and laughed.

"Leah, Leah-" Seth said barging in the room.

My eyes snapped open. "For fucks sake Seth you heard of knocking." I said pushing Jake off me, covering myself.

He didn't even blink at the position he found us in. His face was stone cold with a twinge of fear in his eyes. I knew why he was here. "We have to go now. It's about Bella." He said as he bolts back out the door.

Jake and I just stood there for a moment processing what he had said and then figuring out what to do. I watched Jacob's face turn from confused to blank, then angry and cold. "Jake…" I said sitting up and crawling over to him.

He flinched away from me. "Let's just get this over with. We knew it was coming." He said as he got out the bed and headed out my room.

I huffed in frustration and followed him out. There was a reason I couldn't get comfortable with my life and it all seemed to be tied to Bella and the leeches.

By the time we phased Seth had already sounded the alarm and everyone was phasing in, heading to our usual meeting place. We all knew what it was about even before Seth started showing everyone what Charlie had said. According to Charlie, Bella came back from her honeymoon sick but the leech doctor wouldn't let him see her.

_Thei__r setting up their story._ _They'll say she died of the illness and then they'll disappear. We have to get them before they leave. Let's go now. _Jacob snarled. Wow, I didn't think he'd be on board for this.

_Jacob__, let's just calm down for a minute we have to look at this from all sides first._ Sam said back.

_Ok, now no one's making sense__. Since when is Sam _not_ up for this._ I thought to myself.

_Since I realized how much is at stake here_. He responded.

_You're a coward__, Sam._ Jake growled. Sam growled back.

I was starting to feel the uneasiness coming from the rest of the pack as they watch Jacob and Sam go back and forth.

Sam stood up and faced the rest of the pack. _The pack will not attack the Cullen's not until we can confirm they broke the treaty_. Sam commanded, the order touching everyone.

_It'll be too late__. They'll be gone_. Jacob argued standing up going nose to nose with Sam.

_Jacob you are not ready for this fight. You know you won't be able to kill her and if one us does it you'll hold a grudge. You still love her__, you'll always love her._ Sam said back.

_Ouch_. I muttered feeling a slight stab in my heart.

_I do not__. I want what's best for her and being a soulless creature is not_. Jake yelled back.

_So you're willing to risk your life and everyone else__'s for her? You're willing to risk Leah's life Jacob?_ He asked. Jake's mood changed rather quickly to that.

_Hey, don't use me to prove your point.__ I can hold my own thank you very much._ I yelled at Sam.

_It's true Leah. He's not ready for this fight.__ Love doesn't just fade away over a few months._ Sam said looking at me, but my attention was on Jacob as he began to back away from the group, whatever he was thinking he didn't want the rest of us to know.

_Don't run, Jake._ I asked him. He had never run from me before and he wouldn't now right? He looked at me one last time before taking off. Before Sam could stop him he phased back to human. I got up to follow him.

_L__et him go._ Sam ordered, so I sat back down and awaited Sam's next orders.

Sam put us on high alert but since he and Jared had been patrolling all day they phased out to get some rest. As soon as Sam phased I took off tracing Jacob's scent. I wanted to be there for him because I knew this was hard for him. I traced his scent from Billy's, to the garage where he got on his motorcycle and headed down the road. When I traced his scent to the treaty line I knew where he had gone and I was furious. Whatever was on his mind wasn't good for me. Either Sam was right and he did still love her and was trying to save her again or Sam was wrong and he hated her and went over there to kill her. Either way would end in heartbreak.

I paced at the line trying to keep my thoughts in check until I knew for sure but I couldn't help thinking of Sam's words and thinking maybe the whole time I was being used to pass the time. Maybe Sam was right and I had been foolish to believe that he could love me.

_Lee, don't think like that._ Seth told me. Seth really had come around to liking Jacob and had been on his side this morning when my mom proposed we'd live together.

I paced for over an hour before Jacob phased and crossed the treaty line. I let out a sigh of relief that he was still alive, but that meant Sam was right and he did still love her. _Quil sound the alarm I need to speak with Sam. _Jacob asked. Quil howled and Jake and I ran to meet up with the others. _Leah, that's not what's happening-_

I growled and snapped at him to stop. _It's not the time. Let's get this over with and then we'll talk._ I told him closing him out.

He whined a little but didn't press me. _What's going on, Jacob?_ Sam asked as soon as he phased in.

_Bella is really sick...or something like it._ Jacob explained as we entered the clearing. Jacob showed us the images. Bella looking all sick and stupid hold her swollen belly.

_The bitch is pregnant oh the irony._ I howled in disgust.

First everyone's mind went blank with shock. Then once the words and images sunk in everyone began to voice their opinion.

_How could that happen? _

_What will it be? _

_A monster. _

_If it's killing its mother now imagine what it'll do to us_.

The whole pack was thinking at once giving me too much to sort through. I tried to keep focused on Sam's thoughts because his were most important; Jacob was in tune with me because as soon as Sam thought it Jacob was on his feet.

_Sam, we can't do that_. Jacob said picking out Sam's attack.

_We don't have a choice Jacob this will endanger the whole tribe._ Sam argued back.

He took a deep breath and we all knew what was coming. It touched us all one by one, his command to get prepared for battle. Jacob and Seth were the most resistant so the command toppled them to the ground.

I whined for my little brother, but did what I was told. I gathered Colin and Brady around Seth and we went over our strategy to take out the physic leech and the older dark-haired one. _I'll take Alice you guys just get the other one._ I told them. I knew Alice would be a challenge even without her physic abilities so I left her up to me. Seth stayed on the ground. _Seth, you don't have a choice so either get with it or go home. I'm not going to let you get kill because you have some weird attachment to the leeches. _I yelled at him. I'd be damn before I let my brother get killed over this. I really wish Sam would make him go home.

_No._ A voice said to Sam. We all turned to see Jacob standing up facing Sam_. I said no Sam._ He said again this time added the double timbre in his voice.

_Alpha command? Did Jake just alpha command Sam?_ I thought. All of a sudden Jacob looked a lot different to everyone. He was embracing his birthright. He was Alpha, the true Alpha.

_What have you done__, Jacob?_ Sam snarled moving towards Jacob. Sam wasn't good with authority even before he became a wolf so there was no way he was going to let Jacob take the lead now. _He'll have to fight for it._ Sam thought.

Jacob growled in response.

_Shit__, are they going to fight?_ Paul thought.

Jacob growled. _No, I'm not going to fight Sam but I will not allow any one to hurt Bella while she's human. That's against all that we stand for._ He told us all. Seth agreed.

_So what are you going to do, Jacob? I'm not going to let you have this alpha position so you can get our whole tribe slaughtered. You'll have to take it from me._ Sam snarled taking another step towards Jacob.

_I__'m not going to take it from you. I'm just going to be there in between you and the Cullen's._ He told him and ran away, towards the Cullen's.

I felt the breath leave my body, my skin tightened as the hair on the nape of my neck stood up. The pain rocked through everyone, each had some kind of connection to Jake and now it was severed. Cut off. It was like an arm had been ripped from my body, that's how it felt and the whole pack felt it.

It registered instantly when Seth broke away I felt the worse of it, of course, ever since the little runt was born we'd been attached at the hip, not always a good thing, but now he was gone. I couldn't hear him, I couldn't feel him. Up until now I had always thought of Seth as the only male in my life that hadn't abandon me, now that point was moot. He had left me, they both had and now I was alone, really alone this time.

Once the howling stopped everyone realized that we couldn't hear them anymore, a fact I had picked as soon as they decided to break off. Sam shouted every curse word, in both Quileute and English, he could think of while the rest just kept quiet, too afraid to push Sam to the point of insanity. He was nearing his edge you could see it in his eyes.

_Sam_ I spoke up first.

He turned to me with a snarl, his mind turning possessive.

_I just want to go home, tell mom what happened with Seth._ I told him defensively.

He grunted but conceded_. You be back here at dawn. Go home and phase back in at dawn._ He commanded.

I got up, feeling weak from the weight the days events, and jogged home.

The talk with mom was difficult I hadn't processed how I felt about it yet so when she broke down about Seth I couldn't comfort her. I couldn't tell her that Jake would take care of him, even though I knew he would because I needed to make my own plans. _But what were they?_ I tried to sleep but my mind couldn't focus on anything but what my next move was. My ties to Jake and my baby brother were strong. This place, my home since I was born, no longer felt like a home without them here. As hurt as I was about Jacob sacrificing everything for Bella Dumbass Cullen, I sort of understood it. I couldn't, no matter how much had changed, watch Sam die, or play a part in his death. I had too much love for him so I knew what Jake was thinking.

I paced for hours until dawn began to approach then I started panicking. I knew I had to figure out what to do. I couldn't be against Seth and Jake. I couldn't attack them or even begin to see them as the enemy but what if Sam decided to attack the Cullen's still? How could I go against my tribe while still protecting my family? And where would that leave both packs? How could I attack my brother or my pack brother, my former love or my future love? I wasn't the only one stuck in the middle, and I knew I wouldn't be the only one to suffer if Sam moved forward with his plans. So I had to stop him and there was only one way to do that.

* * *

**R+R peeps, let me know what ya think.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Ok no excuse this time I've just been lazy but here is Chp 10. Sorry it took so long. Thanks to all my reviewers I truly appreciate you guys taking the time out to comment on my stories. Also check out my other story "To Build A Home" if you haven't already. As always I own nothing.**

**Enjoy, **

**Elle**

* * *

**Leah's POV**

Things shouldn't have been so easy. I should've felt something as I wrote that note to my mom, telling her I was leaving to go help Seth and Jake, when I jumped out my window and snuck off the rez. I just betrayed Sam, rest of the pack, my family, and the elders yet it didn't feel wrong. It felt freeing and liberating actually. I hadn't been so invested in the whole wolf thing before so maybe that was why I didn't feel anything. As I raced over to the leech territory I thought about how Sam would feel and I would be lying if I said I wasn't enjoying those thoughts. He would be pissed, feel betrayed and alone, and most of all he would be stuck just like I had when he left me. I snickered in my mind a little. _Ha, take that Sam._

I played it smart, taking the back routes until I got to the Cullen boarder line then I made a beeline for the manor. I would have to talk to Sam about that one day because it was way too easy to get past the guys 1st and 2nd circuits and if I could do it then a leech could too. I ran as fast as I could because I knew the leeches were most likely on high alert, like the pack, so any scent would be considered the enemy, and a fight between me and a leech wouldn't solve anything right now.

I crossed Seth's scent on the way in noticing that Jake's was faint, hours old while Seth's was fresh. I growled. _He let him run the circuit by himself. I'm gonna kill him_.

A howl pierced the morning silence causing me to groan. _Seth you little runt, shut up it's just me!_ I shouted. I couldn't hear him, actually I couldn't hear anyone. I guess I hadn't picked a side yet because I really was doing this to prevent Sam from attacking not because I believed in what Jacob stood for. I understood Jacob's reasoning, and I guess I understood Bella's as well. I knew if I was in that position I would fight for my child. I sighed heavily. _Couldn't believe I was thinking this_. Even though I hated her I knew her pain, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

_Leah?_ Seth thought shockingly.

_Hey Sethy Poo_ I said trying to hide my excitement. It didn't work, my tail wouldn't stop wagging. Wow I really am a dog.

_Lee?_ I heard Jacob say. A sense of relief poured from him to me. He was afraid that his decision to go against Sam had ultimately ruined our relationship. _Lee I didn't... I don't love her like that but I can't..._ He sighs heavily. His mind flashed into the horrible, as he pictured watching Sam kill Bella right before his eyes, while he stood back and did nothing. _I can't let that happen._

_I know that's why I'm here. I get it and I'm here to help_. I told him.

He grinned a little and came over to me rubbing my shoulder with his head. _Seth, get some rest._ He said softly and nudged me to follow him into the forest.

_Yeah I need to kick your ass for letting Seth patrol by himself. I'm not even gone a whole day and your putting him in danger. Geez Jake he's the only brother I got._ I scolded him.

_Awwww sis I love you too._ Seth laughed as he got himself comfortable. He had found a spot near the stink manor to sleep and soon drifted into unconsciousness.

_He was alright besides what choice did I have. If you recall we didn't get much sleep the night before_. He joked about showing me mental images of our night together.

I laughed lightly then sighed it was crazy how much had changed in so little time.

_What happened after we left_? He asked as we headed out running the loop Seth had earlier. Jake was ahead of me leading and I let him lead for now.

_Well a lot of howling I'm__ sure you heard but it hurt physically when you guys left, like someone had taken my arm. _I grimace thinking of the pain. _Then Sam went berserk flipped his shit like I'd never seen. I went home and thought about it then snuck over here. I'm due in right now so I'm sure we'll here some more howling soon._ I laughed.

_Why did you come? __What if Sam attacks? I won't let you fight them_. He said his tone same possessive tone as Sam's. Must be an alpha thing.

_Sam won't attack with 3 wolves down and the leeches on high alert. He's not stupid. Besides he won't attack if I'm here_. I said lowly.

_I'm not so sure about that. And if he tries I'll kill him._ Jake snarled.

_Remember what he said to you yesterday about how love just doesn't disappear over a few months how you will always love her, he was speaking from experience. _I told cocked a brow at me_. He's right love doesn't fade, it changes but it never goes away. Just like you and her, Sam and I are in the same boat. I know Sam won't run the chance of attacking if I'm in the way it would be too risky. Hurting me is like hurting himself._ I sighed. I didn't catch it when Sam said it to Jake, I didn't get the meaning behind the words, his implications, but when I got home and thought it over, thinking of how much Sam meant to me and that was why I understood what Jake was going through I realized it. Sam was my weakness and I was his.

Jacob stopped in his tracks and turned to me. _Its never going to be easy for us, is it?_ He thought in a low voice. His thoughts flashed back to all of our hard times together, this one being the hardest. _I'm sorry for doing this to you. The last thing I wanted to do was to cause you pain._ _I just want to make sure that the pack doesn't make a mistake. _

_Jake_- I was interrupted by the howling in the distance. I knew that howl._ Sam_. I whined and started back up the line. _We need to get back to work._

* * *

Jacobs POV

To say I was relieved to see Leah was an understatement. My biggest worry after I broke away from Sam was what Leah felt about it. What thoughts was Sam projecting in her mind? After everything had happened over the summer I had turned my back on the person who trusted me the most. I still couldn't believe I did that. But I was doing this for a good cause, right? I wasn't going to stand by and watch Sam wage war with the vamps and then kill Bella while she was still human. It wasn't right. When Leah showed up I felt a better about my choice. When I broke from the pack I wanted to accomplish two things. One was to stop Sam and the other was to save Bella from herself...again. With Leah's help I had accomplished the first the second was a little harder to deal with. I sighed heavily as I made my way over to the house. It had been almost 12 hours since Leah showed up and still no word from sam. I figured if would do something then it would've been done by now so I decided to update the leeches. Leah was sleep and Seth was back on I needed to get some rest but I needed to check in with Bella make sure I was fighting for something.

When was in walking distance I phased back and yanked on my shorts. It didn't take long for pixie to come out and greet me. Her daily dose of Tylenol was finally back.

"Hey pixie" I yawned. She grinned slightly. "Any changes?" I asked lowly.

"It's not getting better Carlisle thinks if we don't act soon neither will..." Her voice drifted and something along the lines of pain swept across her face. It was clear that she cared for Bella or at least a leech apoximation of caring. From what we were told by the elder's vamps weren't capable of human emotion however the Cullens had proved them wrong.

I dropped my head in frustration. Why won't she listen to anyone? "So what's next we wait until she...dies? Blondie needs to get off the motherhood train." I snarled. It was all her fault Bella even thought she could survive this. Carlisle had given her the percentages of her and the thing surviving yet blondie kept pumping her brain full of insipration.

"Rose is coming around..." I looked up to see Edward standing in the doorway. I nodded slightly to him and he nodded back. Can't really remember the exact moment I started being polite to him. "...it's just Bella who needs convincing, Carlisle won't do it without her consent unless he doesn't have a choice and if that happens he's not sure she'll survive." He said with a straight face. He looked worse than yesterday he seemed to be giving up hope. I wasn't though I'd never give up on her.

"I could talk to her again." I proposed. He shook his head. I shrugged back and sat on the stairs.

"You seem more relaxed now that Leah is here." Pixie observed. I looked up to her and then over to Edward who just gave me the I-can-read-your-mind-duh look. I figured he had known about Leah since no one questioned why Seth howled 12 hours ago.

Eventually Edward retreated back to Bella's side and I unwillingly lay across the porch to rest my eyes.

"You should wake up!" I heard someone yell into my ear. I jumped up in defense. My eyes adjusted until I could see half the leech clan looking at me.

"You were snoring" Blondie said in disgust.

"And Leah is approaching. Edward said she's..." Pixie crumpled her face in confusion.

"She's pissed." The big one Emmett added on. "And whatever she's thinking it's pissing Eddy off." He said looking behind me.

I followed his eyes to Edward who was in the doorway with a slight grimace on his face. _Oh I could only imagine what Leah was thinking?_ I sighed and stood up my bones cracking in the process. _How long had I been sleep_? I looked up to the sky noticing the lightening creep from the east. _Shit, it's almost morning_. I slept for at least 8 hours no wonder she's upset.

Leah appeared out from the cover of the trees, evil look on her face, her dress shredded in several areas. I tried not to think about how hot she was but I could feel the excitement blossoming inside me. I met her half way knowing how uncomfortable she was here.

"You could've at least phased and slept in. When you're human I don't know where you are." She shouted at me.

I grinned because she was mad because she was worried about me. I snatched her up in a hug. "Sorry I was just resting my eyes and I fell asleep." I explained.

She huffed and pulled away. "Seth figured that. Any progress?" She whispered as she looked pass me to the house. She looked down with a look I didn't really recognize, sadness maybe.

I shook my head. "I'll spell Seth. He needs to eat, and so do you." I changed the subject.

She sighed and grimaced. "I'll eat raw; I'm not eating food cooked by leeches." She grinned. I laughed a little and walked towards the brush with her. I stole a quick glance at the house noticing Edward's puzzled face before it disappeared back into the house.

* * *

Another day had passed and honestly I was starting to get nervous. There was still no word from Sam and Bella wasn't getting any better. I was starting to worry, starting to lose confidence in my decision. Just like the day before I went to check in on Bella. This time it was Carlisle who met me at the door. He looked defeated as he walked out and sat on the stairs. It was like he didn't even want to be near a situation where he couldn't help.

"She's not looking too good is she?" I asked peering into the house before closing the door. I didn't want to be around her right now.

"The fetus is killing her, because it doesn't have enough to sustain itself. If we don't find a solution then we'll lose both." he said his shoulders slump and defeated.

_If they change her then she __will be able to survive_. I thought mentally.

"If she was willing but she knows that her changing will kill the baby..." It was Edward this time at the doorway. He stepped closer to me and motioned for me to follow him and I did. We rounded the back of the house towards the garage. Once we were out of eyesight he turned to me and took a deep breath. "If we have to...if Bella's state declines so much that they'll both die I'll have to act fast. I need to know if I have your permission to change her if i need to." he stated.

I pulled back in surprise. _How did we get to this conversation? Why was he asking he's going to do it anyways?_ He nodded slightly letting me know my thoughts were right.

"We want our families to be able to co-exist after this...if you give me permission then we're not breaking the treaty, then Sam has no reason to attack." he said, having thought this through a lot I assumed. _But it's not my permission to give._ "It is as rightful Alpha, the direct descendant of the Alpha who created the treaty." he answered.

I chewed the inside of my cheek for a minute. "Give me some time ok...I need to think about it." I told him.

He nodded. "It's not going to be long before we have to make that decision." he informed me which basically he was saying hurry up and make a decision. I nodded and headed back into the trees. I needed to talk to Leah, ask her opinion, if we were partners now this decision had to be made by both of us.

I showed Leah what had transpired with Edward and after thinking about it for a while she sighed. _We really don't have a choice in it, Jake. If you don't give them permission then Sam will attack and where does that leave us, any of us. _She said thinking of her, Seth, me, Embry, Quil, the young ones._ We'll never be a pack again if we fight each other we'll never be right again if you don't make this choice_. She told me.

_And afterwards when it's all said and done__, how do you think Sam will react? _I questioned.

She snorted_. Pissed but it's not his decision it never was. Jake, you're Alpha now and as much as you might not want to admit it this pack, not just Seth and I but the other pack as well, is yours and they will follow you. They won't have a choice._ She sighed.

I thought about it for a minute or two before realizing that she was right. I didn't want to make this decision, the decision that would ultimately turn my best friend into my enemy but I had to for all of us, not just Bella and the Cullen's but for my pack and Sam's as well.

_There's something we could get out the deal though._ She added before phasing back as she headed to the house.

I met Leah at the front yard she was standing there her nose curled up in disgust. I sighed and took her hand, rubbing it as we walked towards the door. "It stinks" She hissed.

I nodded and rolled my eyes as I opened the door. She looked at me questioningly. "I'm pretty sure they know were here, Lee." I told her as I dragged her ass in.

We rounded the corner where Bella was on the couch looking worse than before, next to her was Edward while Blondie was at her feet. I cleared my throat and motioned for Edward to meet me outside. Blondie hissed as Edward got up, she must knew something was up.

"Esme, can you watch Bella for a minute?" she asked as she followed Edward, who just sighed.

We followed them out and once outside, Carlisle had joined us as well and once we were outside Edward turned to us. "Thank you." he said, I couldn't believe I was thinking it but he sounded sincere.

"There is a condition though." Leah added. I looked at her in confusion while Edward sighed. "If we give you permission to change her, to break the treaty then you have to promise something." she looked at Carlisle. He too looked confused. "Never come back...I mean ever. The treaty will only take effect if in case of any supernatural emergency." she stated.

"You mean if you need us" the blonde added coldly.

Leah rolled her eyes. "I mean if your interference here causes anymore damage. Our ancestors left this burden on us but I won't pass it on to my... to the future generations. Our generation is the last to phase from Cullen presence...deal?" she asked firmly.

I looked at her and I nodded in agreement. Not only did this save everyone involved from a meaningless war but this saved our future children from having to deal with this sacrifice. Carlisle nodded. "If we knew that our presence was causing you to transform we would've never came. We are sorry this had to happen to any of you." he said looking me and Leah in the eyes. Leah nodded. Carlisle looked over at Edward and sighed. "I'll go get set-up." he said before turning into the house.

Blondie stopped him. "Wait a minute, Bella did not agree to this. She wants to fight for him, she won't consent." She hissed.

Edward growled. "She will die Rosalie are you so desperate to have that missing part of your life that your willing to kill Bella." He roared. He was fuming I wasn't sure how he hadn't ripped her a new one yet. Emmett stepped up next to the blonde. _Oh, that's how. _

"Rosalie the baby will die anyways, Bella's body can't sustain it, they both will die." Carlisle told her.

She looked down. "It's not my decision it's hers and she'll never agree to..."

"I'll talk to her" Leah interrupted. _Wait Leah_. I looked at her to see that she was serious. Edward nodded to everyone but the blonde hissed.

"If you're so sure she won't change her mind Rose, then you have nothing to worry about." Edward said placing a hand on Blondie shoulder. Leah looked at me for a second then continued in the house.

_What the hell just happened? Why was Leah trying to talk to Bella? She hated her. _

"I think you should go check on Seth, Jacob." Edward said breaking me out of my thoughts.

"He's sleep." I said trying to hear what Leah was saying to Bella.

"Jacob, you shouldn't ease drop on their conversation, it's a private matter." He said next, I raised a brow to him.

"And what are you doing? You already know what she's going to say so how private could it be now." I growled at him. I didn't like that he knew what was going on inside Leah's head and I did not. I felt like there was a secret both of them now shared and were not trying to tell me. Edward quickly looked away and I growled again. "What don't I know?" I asked.

He sighed. "Whatever it is I'm sure Leah will explain it to you when she's ready. You shouldn't invade her privacy like this...I didn't mean to. If she wants you to know she'll tell you." He said. I listened inside the house for a minute Leah wasn't talking. _Was she waiting for me to leave?_ He nodded answering my thoughts. I grumbled as I stocked off the porch and phased. _Damn, my last pair of shorts._

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**A/N: Ok, so a little cliffy. So basically the biggest change to the actually book is that Jake doesn't get the "brilliant" idea to give Bella the blood so neithier she or the fetus get better. And I'm pretty sure you guys have a few guesses as to what's going to happen next. I hope this puts a few minds at ease about the whole Nessie Imprint thing. But does anyone have a guess as to what Leah is going to say to Bella? Oh, and follow me on Twitter to get updates on my stories and others that I'm working on but have yet to post. I would love to bounce ideas off you guys. I'm at /Lysey13 R+R ppls. Love Ya!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: I know it's been forever but Ive had a rough couple months balancing new family members, new job, and new school so please forgive the delay. With Breaking Dawn coming out in less than 2 weeks I thought it would be a great time to release this chapter. Warning this chp is very emo.**

**As always I own nothing.**

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Leah's POV

I stepped into the house, my nose starting to numb from all the burning. I was slightly grateful of that because I had a feeling this would be a long conversation. I could hear Bella's frantic heartbeat as I turned the corner and spotted her, lying on couch. She could've been dead to anyone else but my wolf hearing picked up on her shallow breaths. "Can I...can I talk to her alone for a minute?" I asked the brunette leech trying to be polite.

She smiled and nodded. "Bella, if you need anything I'm just around the corner." she said then disappeared.

"What do you want to talk to me about?" Bella asked, her voice was low and horse but I could hear the defensiveness in her tone. She had been here before, defending her decision.

I kept quiet as I looked out the window; I knew Jake was still in hearing distance. "Wait" I whispered. I listened as Edward convinced Jake that this was something he did not want to hear second handedly, that he should wait until I was ready to tell him. This was probably the only time I was grateful for his mind-raping ability, even though now he knew my secret, a secret only me and mom knew about. Jake finally retreated to the trees shredding his clothes as he phased. I sighed and turned back around to Bella.

"If you're here to try to change my mind then-" I held up my hand to stop her.

"I'm not." I told her. "I'm here to tell you what you should expect. How you'll feel when you realize that you don't have a choice. How you'll feel when the one thing you never knew you wanted is now something you can never have." I sighed heavily and sat down across from her.

Her brows furrowed in confusion but she let me continue.

"You've gotten everything you could've dreamed of. A husband who loves you, a best friend who would die for you, a family that would kill for you... you got a lot on other people sacrifices, haven't you?" I started off, my voice calm. She swallowed heavily. "Where was your sacrifice in all of this? I used to think about that a lot. You got it all without having to give up one single thing you wanted." I laughed darkly.

"I did, I will my human life, my dad, and my mom-" I looked up at her and she shut up.

"All insignificant to want you'll gain, and all for the sake of you. While others around you had to give up everything, not for them but for you. I used to hate you so much because of that, because in order for you to get everything you wanted I had to lose everything I already had." I breathed, trying to keep my emotions in check, but I couldn't. Before she and the Cullen's came around my life was perfect, innocent, and free of danger and fear. My life with Sam… I sighed and shook my head that was the past and I needed to focus on the very near future.

"But I don't hate you anymore because this is your sacrifice... and I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy." I looked at her swollen belly.

She placed her hand on her stomach and frowned. Her eyes met mine and recognition dawn on her. "You lost your baby?" she asked her voice thick with the emotion that was coming from deep down inside.

I nodded as the tears running over I didn't even bother to wipe them. I hadn't cried about this in a long time so all those times I kept it locked away were breaking free now. After a few deep breaths I continued. "Right before Sam disappeared I realized I had missed my period. I told my mom and she had me take a home pregnancy test. I took 3 of them all read positive. I was so happy that Sam and I were going to have a baby but when he disappeared I started having second thoughts about it all. If he could leave me like that how was he going be when I told him I was pregnant...?"

I shook my head. "...he showed up a few weeks later but he was different and I was so scared to tell him, so scared he would leave me again. Then he broke up with me and my world came crashing down. Seeing him happy with Emily it killed me, it tore me to pieces. I didn't eat for days, and I hardly slept. And then one day I woke up in blood soaked sheets and..." I stopped abruptly and covered my face remembering that day. How from that moment I was forever changed. "...I blamed Sam for it at first but then I realized it was my fault, I didn't eat, I didn't sleep, I didn't care for the life that was inside me. _My baby_. It was my fault. Then my dad died and I phased, I became sterile, and I knew I had no choice in the matter. I was never meant to have kids, it was never my choice. I'll never get to look in a little girl or boy's eyes and see me reflected back, it was never meant for me, same goes for you Bella."

I finally looked back up to her to see the tears in her eyes, maybe the first time I had seen so much emotion from her. To say that I felt sorry for her was an understatement, if there was a way around this I would gladly support it.

"You don't get the choice either. When you go into shock or whatever Edward will have Carlisle take the baby out and then they'll change you. You wake up in a different world and when it all settles down you'll scream and cry, well want to cry, and nothing will ever be right. You'll always feel wrong." my jaw tightened at the end of that sentence. "You'll think you're getting better then you'll see a mother and her newborn walking the streets, or even on TV and you'll be right back to where you started." I sighed and stood up looking out the window.

"Why are you telling me this?" she whispered.

"Because as much as I want to hate you for all you've done I don't want you to go through what I had to. I had to realize this on my own and it only made things worse. I fought it every day and that's what turned me into that harpy I used to be. Maybe if someone was there to tell me how it would feel I could've expected it and been ok enough for me to spend more time with my dad or live a normal life while I still could." I turned to her and sighed. "I'm telling you that it's going to happen and when it does don't drown in your misery, it won't… it won't help the pain, it'll make it worse." I whispered.

"Does it... does it ever get better?" she asked next. I knew then that she giving up the fight she knew it now; there was no way to survive this with that thing inside her killing her.

I took a deep breath and nodded, thinking of all Jacob had done for me, and how much I had changed over these past 3 months. "It'll never completely go away, but if you could see the good in your life and forget about the bad you'll feel better. You'll always feel that pain but...we all make sacrifices and this is yours." she looked down and cried out softly. I reached out for her placing my hand on her shoulder. "Don't wait until it's almost too late, because it just might be. Don't put Edward and Jake and the rest of your family through the possibility that you might not make it. We all make sacrifices, sometimes not willingly, and sometimes not for ourselves but Bella if you do this now, you're going to be saving a lot of heartbreak." I told her with a small grin on my face.

She looked up to me and nodded. I got up and headed for the door. Before I was out of her sight I turned back. "I'm always a phone call away if you need someone to talk to." I smiled slightly. She looked at me in shock. "I know shocking huh? But uh I know I would've killed to have someone who understood how it felt, someone who could not only sympathize but empathize. So if you need me I'll help even if you are a bloodsucker." I laughed a little.

She did too. "Thank you." she said as I left out the room.

I got to the door and a cold hand touched my shoulder. I looked over and it was Edward. "Thank you." he said. I looked passed him to see the blonde one looking at me too, her looked resembled mine, a look of pain. I nodded to them both and walked off the porch, controlling every instinct to phase. No one should be in my head right now.

I finally stopped in an opening after running until my feet hurt. I sat on the grass and pulled my knees to my chest. I was tired of crying so I just wept empty tears. Reliving all of that with Bella just opened a chest I had buried deep inside me, when I first phased. I didn't want anyone to know I had miscarried, especially Sam. That chapter of my life was over now, but like I told Bella you never forget the pain, I wouldn't for as long as I lived I would never forget the pain of losing my baby. Especially now that I knew I couldn't have anymore but I guess motherhood wasn't in the cards for me and I would have to just except that even though just the thought of it made me feel sick.

I was here for about an hour when I heard the rustling in the trees behind me. I didn't even turn, I knew it was Jake, I knew he would find me. I felt his warm hand on my shoulder and I looked up. I bit my lip to stop the tears from falling because I felt bad for him; if he stayed with me he would never have kids. He would share in the fate I had, and it wasn't fair to him.

I stood up and hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry." I whispered.

He hugged me back rubbing me for comfort. "You never told me." he whispered.

"It was my burden to carry, Jacob not yours." I said knowing he had figured it out.

He released me and wiped my face. "It _is_ mine if we're a team then it's mine just as much as it's yours. I love you and I can't stand for you to be in pain, don't carry this with you let me take it for a while you've carried long enough." he said moving my hair out my face.

I shrugged and looked down. "You deserve to be with someone who can give you those things, Jake. I can't." I sobbed.

He shook his head. "I want you, ok? I want whatever you can give because it's always going to be more than I expected, your more than I expected or deserve." he said firmly. He kissed my forehead and hugged me again as I cried into his chest.

He was so much more than I ever expected, he breathed life back into me when I was wishing for death, he pulled me out of the ocean when I was drowning, he pulled me off the edge when I felt like jumping. Sam had killed me; Jake brought me back to life.

_1 day later_

Now that it was over we had a whole new problem to deal with: Sam. I was sure he wouldn't attack us but I wasn't too sure he would let us back so easily. Then there was the whole alpha thing. Jake wasn't letting go of his newly found position and I doubt Sam would step down even when he found out that the Bella situation had been taken care of. It really had been resolved in the best way. Bella was a vamp, big whoop, but they were leaving and they would never return. I had made them agree to that. I couldn't have kids but everyone else's kids were safe from this curse.

_Leah, we don't know that for sure_. Jacob said softly. I rolled my eyes now that he knew he wouldn't stop trying to convince me that I was wrong. I turned my attention back to the open forest. Seth was back at the leech manor until we knew Sam was going to go all psycho and try to kill Jake. I couldn't have my brother fighting any of the pack.

_So we just run for it?_ I asked.

He shook his head. _Sam's here I can feel it_. He growled. I rolled my eyes it was getting annoying how much rage was coming out of him. He wasn't happy about Bella being a vamp and if Sam tried something, Jake would tear him a new one.

Jacob took one step inside our territory, _can I even call it ours anymore,_ and the growling began. Out stepped Sam and Paul hunched in fighting positions. _Well I guess I_ can't_ call it ours anymore._

_Sam we just want to talk_. I said softly, trying to ease the tension in the air.

_They can't hear you, remember?_ Jacob said, keeping his eyes on Sam.

_Ok, so phase._ I told him.

_Only if he does. I'm not letting my guard down around him, and why did he bring Paul?_ Jacob said sounding quite paranoid. But it did make me wonder as to where Jared was. _You don't think they'll attack?_ He asked.

_No I told you-_

_Yeah he won't hurt _you_ but you're here not at the manor_.

_He wouldn't, Seth would get hurt. I swear if something happens to him I'll... _I snarled in Sam direction causing Paul to growl at me and Jake to growl at Paul. _Oh this is ridiculous. _I huffed and backed away even to phase.

Jacob growled as the two opposing wolves turned their attention to my naked body. I rolled my eyes as I grabbed my dress and slung it on.

"We're just here to talk, Sam." I told the black wolf. Sam nodded and phased back as well. "Where's everyone else?" I asked cutting my eyes to Paul.

"They're around..." Sam said in a vague manor that I'm sure didn't sit well with Jacob. "...what do you want to talk about?" He asked me.

"Are you planning on attacking the Cullen's still?" I asked next.

He smirked. "And why would I tell you that? You're with them, remember?" He said in disgust.

I sort of took offense to that. It was like I was the enemy now, enemy to my own tribe, a tribe I had sacrifice so much for. I didn't mean it at first but I smacked Sam clear cross his face. Paul growled, Jacob growled but I didn't care. "I can't believe you would say that to me. I'm the enemy Sam really, that's what you see me as? I've sacrificed everything for the betterment of this tribe and I'm not even allowed on my land" I screamed at him as I pushed passed him, but he just held his ground and wouldn't let me by. "I swear Sam if you don't let me by I will hurt you." I growled ready to phase if I have to.

"Leah" Jacobs voice suddenly came from behind me. He grabbed my hand and pulled me back. "Sam this decision is not yours, let us by to talk to the elders you have no authority to keep us out." Jacob said.

"Fine" Sam said. "Tomorrow at noon you, Leah and Seth meet us here." He said then turned away not waiting for an answer.

We stayed there for a minute then phased back and headed off to the manor. Seth met us half way and Jake explained everything to him. Seth went to the stink manor to eat while Jake and I headed out to hunt. I still refused to eat anything made by the bloodsuckers and I always ate raw better when Jake was with me.

_You know you're pretty good at this you shouldn't be so resistant_. He said as he ripped into his kill.

I turned to mine and sighed, ripping into mine as well. Just like last time Jake's mind and mine linked as his went into more primal thoughts, thinking only as wolf. I began to relax as I ate forcing those human thoughts out. Once we were done we headed to the river to clean off.

"You know there's a chance the elders won't agree with me. You and Seth might have to return back to Sam's pack." Jacob said. I turned to him in shock suddenly he didn't seem so confident in his decision.

"That won't happen." I whispered.

"But-" he began to say but I cut him off with a kiss.

"I won't let it happen. It's either all of us or none of us. I won't be separated from you, I just got you." I cracked a small smile.

He sighed heavily at my stubbornness and shook his head. "So you're willingly to live outside if we aren't welcomed in la push anymore." He asked, looking me dead in the eyes.

I nodded. "As long as we're together. I'd do anything as long as I get to be with you." I said rubbing my finger across his lips.

"Leah you're incredible you know that. I don't know how I ever lived without you but I plan on living the rest of my life with you. I'll never let you go, I promise." He told me as he turned us around so now I was leaning against the river bank.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I felt his hands creep up my sides. I looked down but I couldn't see through the water. He gave me an all knowing grin in response. "Jake, there are vamps and my little brother not too far from here. We'll get caught." I hissed at him even though my legs were beginning to open up. _Damn hormones._

"I'll keep my ears open, come on Lee I need you." He whispered lowering his lips to mine, some kind of desperation flickered in them. I couldn't resist, my own body had already giving in, so I relaxed into him and let him take to bliss.

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**A/N: Sorry no juicy lemon in this chapter but maybe in the next. R+R, let me know what you think about this chapter and how should the next one go with the showdown between Jacob and Sam. Should Sam and Jacob fight or should someone give in? Only a couple more chps to go in this story *tear* but maybe if you like i can do a sequel and i do plan on releasing a playlist to this story as well.**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I know it's been toooooo long I have no excuses for it, but here it is.**

**Leah's POV**

Waking up the next day I felt a little overwhelmed. For the first time in a long time I didn't want to fight anyone and I knew some part of this day would include arguing with Sam and the elders. I just wanted to go back to the time when making breakfast for Jake and Seth was the least enjoyable part of my day. When the toughest decision I had to make was whether or not Jake and I live together. Now I realized how stupid I had been harboring on the negative. Letting the pass dictate my life I never knew how limited those days were. But that was my life when everything was going smoothly it was only a matter of time when the darkness would return. I couldn't trust anything to stay. Jake tried to convince me that things wouldn't always be this way, this crazy, but I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I was certain that everything would come to a head today and someone would have to sacrifice a lot.

Jake's hands curved their way around my hips as he pulled me up and handed me my clothes. "Thanks" I mumbled.

He took in my attitude and turned me to face him. "After today it'll all be over. Regardless of what happens we end all this nonsense today." He promised. He helped me put on my dress and kissed my lips softly. "And next week we're moving in together." He grinned.

That got me to crack a smile. "Damn, I thought I had weaseled out of that." I joked.

He wrapped his arms around me. "Ha…never." He laughed.

I smiled and shook my head. "You are hands down the best thing that has ever happened to me." I said honestly. It came out like so easily like I was saying hi to him. It was effortless. Jacob almost in shock as I was pulled back examined my face then broke out with a wicked smile.

"Of course I am. Who else would be? Seth!" he joked and pulled out of our embrace.

Once he was no longer blocking my view my heart shot up into my throat. I looked into his eyes and I knew it wasn't good. "Sam" I whispered to the tall black wolf just feet away from me.

"Sam? You're kidding me, right?" Jake said from behind me obviously not looking where I was. Sam growled and Jacob was instantly in front of me. I started to panic thinking that the rest of the pack were here and were going to attack us and the Cullen's. My mind was racing half wanted to go to Seth, protect him and the other half wanted to stay here with Jake because the look in Sam's eyes. "Go to Seth make sure the Cullen's are warned." Jake told me.

Sam stepped closer and snarled. "Sam, we had a deal." I tried to reason, but he continued to advance. I stepped back in front of Jacob. Sam wouldn't hurt me right? "I'm not leaving you, Jake." I whispered.

Sam suddenly sprang forth towards me shocking both of us so much that I froze. I felt his teeth dig into my shoulder his front legs scrape into my arms and torso but I didn't scream or yelp in pain I was still shocked. It took about a second for Sam to do his damage and another second until Jake got him off me. By the time I looked up Jake had Sam by the neck shaking him like a rag doll. I looked down at my arm noticing the streaming of blood running down it. My cry for Seth turned into a howl as I phased.

_Lee, what's going on?_ Seth phased in quickly.

_Sam and Jake are fighting!_ I said showing him what I was witnessing.

_Fighting? I thought you said-_

_I know what I said Seth Sam obviously changed his mind or was lying the entire time._ I said as he approached. _Seth, go get help!_ I commanded him. With Paul and the others no where to be found Sam had acted on his own which meant they didn't agree with this. Maybe someone could calm him down. Sam was snapping at Jake but Jake had him pinned down. All I could feel from Jake was rage. He kept playing Sam's attack on me over and over again.

_He attacked you, while you were still HUMAN! _Seth screamed wanting to come back and take a swing at Sam_. _

_Seth, stay out of this go get the others._ I commanded him. _Jake, don't hurt him too badly._ I tried to reason with him.

_Hurt him? I'm going to kill him. _He thought his teeth closing around Sam's neck again.

_Jacob no!_ I screamed pushing him as hard as I could off Sam. As much as I wanted him dead I knew we would all regret it. _This can't happen this way._ I managed to get Jake off but Sam just wouldn't let up he pushed past me and bit into Jacobs leg and tossed him into a tree. I leaped between him and Jacob_. _

_Leah, stay out of this._ He told me.

_No, Sam we had a deal. Why are you doing this?_ I asked. He didn't mean to but a conversation between he, Jared, and Paul slipped. Both Paul and Jared told him that they thought Jake would be alpha by the end of the day and they would follow him. _That's what this is about, Sam? You can't step down gracefully_. I yelled.

_Shut up, Leah._ Sam jumped passed me and landed square on Jake biting him on the neck.

I sprung forth and landed on Sam's back, using my claws to rip at his eyes. I guess I connected because Sam shook me off letting Jacob go in the process. I hit the ground and jumped back up. He turned towards Jake and they began fighting again. I felt sick just watching them go at each other with true hatred. I just sat there and watch one gain advantage over the other and then it would reverse. Anytime any one wolf would go for the kill I would manage to push them off or distract them enough to let the other one go. Finally I could hear the incoming footsteps. Seth returned back with Jared and Embry and they both sprang into action pulling two apart and trying to reason with Sam. Jared finally got through to him explaining that the elders would never accept him as Alpha if they knew he had ambushed Jake. Sam you can't do this on Cullen territory. I was next to Jake making sure he was ok. After a quick debate with Jared Sam took off towards the tribe while we stayed behind. _How did we get here?_ Seth said thinking about what had transpired yesterday and then this morning. I replayed the conversation that Sam had showed me. Jared gave us the all clear that Sam was back in our territory and had phased to human.

It took a couple hours for everyone to calm down everyone was furious the elders, Seth, Jake and the others. I was still in shock about the whole thing. My assumptions about Sam were obviously wrong and as a result I was hurt more mentally than physically. We were here at Billy's now Sam in one corner steaming, Jake in the other with me and Seth. The rest of the pack and elders were in the middle. Everyone kept looking from Jake to Sam wondering which would speak up first.

Sam cleared his throat causing me to jump. "Ok, Jacob you have something to say to all of us." Sam said crossing his arms. _Fucking prick how bout I'm sorry I attacked you and Leah._ Was he completely forgetting what had just transpired or was he hoping everyone else did? I looked down at the scars on my hands trying my best to keep it together but something inside me was churning. I felt like I was on the verge of tears. I would never forget what he did.

Jake after processing the fact that Sam wasn't going to acknowledge the ambush responded. "Yeah, I do. You were wrong Sam and you know it. I did what I had to do to make sure we upheld our duty as wolves and killing a human under any circumstance is not right." He began. The elders nodded in agreement.

Sam sighed but look pretty ticked off still. "And now I agree with you I acted too quickly and should've consulted the others before I decided it." Sam said. There still wasn't an apology in that statement.

"No, you should've known it was wrong we all felt it but you still commanded us to do it. Your instincts as alpha are wrong." Jake shouted, his voice vibrating at the end, I squeezed his hand to calm him.

Sam growled back, then his position relaxed a little and a coy smile played on his face. "So yours are right then... so why don't you tell us what happened with the leeches obviously something did if you 3 are back." he said, peeking the interest of the elders.

I bit my lip but Jake's face didn't change he wasn't giving Sam any leverage. Jacob turned to the elders while I kept an eye on Sam. "Bella is now a vampire." he said, earning some growls from the pack. "I gave them permission to change her." Jake added, causing more growls to come from the other pack. I looked over to Embry and Quil and the younger ones, they just look anxious because apparently something was about to change.

"It was not your permission to give." Sam shouted.

"Actually Sam it is." Billy spoke up not looking at Sam but at Jacob. "As descendent of the previous Alpha it is his choice." he finalized.

"So you agree with this." Sam said outraged.

"I didn't say that, Sam." Billy answered him back in a tone that told him to lower his voice. Sam calmed down slightly.

"He should've consulted with us before allowing them to break the treaty." He said.

"I….we, didn't have time; it was either this or let her die. That thing inside her was killing her and the only way she would survive was if they changed her." He said.

Sam sighed. "So it was all about her, what about the treaty, what about the innocent people around here she'll kill, they don't matter, Jacob?" he said in a sarcastic manner.

"It wasn't all about her; it was about Charlie and all of us. If you attacked them and we fought you then we would never be right again, this pack would never be the same if we fight each other." he said. Billy nodded and so did my mom and Old Quil.

"We still have to protect La Push she's going to be wild and out of control just like those newborns." Sam tried to justify, little did he know we already had this part figured out.

"They're leaving, Sam" I said. He looked over to me in disgust, like I shouldn't even be speaking at the moment. Well too bad. "I had them agree to a new treaty, a treaty where they are no longer welcomed in this area at all. This way the future generations won't have to suffer as we did. Our ancestors passed this burden on but I won't." I said through my teeth. My mother nodded.

"You can't guarantee that there will never be wolves, Leah." Sam said to me.

"I can guarantee there won't be any because of the Cullen's. I mean it's why we changed and the pack before us." I smiled smugly back.

Sam growled. "You had no right to make these decisions." he said to me.

Billy cleared his throat interrupting our argument. "Well it looks like she does. Sam, I think we all know this was going to happen soon. Jake and Leah are meant to run the pack. We all appreciate your sacrifice but in light of recent events I thinks it's best if we don't prolong the inevitable." He said.

My mouth dropped Billy had just basically made Jake alpha but what did I have to do with anything.

Sam gaped at Billy until he had enough of it. "Sam, you attack them and Leah while she was still human, it's clear that you make some bad choices and honestly the pack won't benefit from those types of careless mistakes." Billy explained.

Sam growled and made his way to the door. "If you make him alpha, this tribe will burn." And with that he left out.

The moment he was out of the house the air left from my lungs causing me to almost fall to the ground. Jake caught me and helped me up. "Are you ok?" he asked. I managed a weak nod before excusing myself to the restroom.

In the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror. I pressed my palm against my shoulder wincing as the pain shot through my body. My hand traced up to the scars on my neck then back down my arm. My entire being was shaking and I tried to keep it together but what for. I had just been attacked by someone who I had once loved, who I thought still loved me and I had the scars to prove it. They would be gone by sundown but I knew they would always be there just under the surface. Just like my tattoo. I looked down to my finger where now laid a black band but Sam's name was still there and I couldn't get away from it. From him. I looked up at my face and I almost felt like I was back 5 months ago, I couldn't even recognize myself and the scars just made it worse. Before over thinking it I walk back out to the front and whispered. "I quit." Jake, who was talking with Billy and Jared looked up to me with a worried face. He came to me instantly his fist balled up as he looked at my scars. "I quit" I said a little louder this time. He looked up at my face confused. "Leah, you can't just quit." My mom said. "The hell I can't. I was just attacked by someone who I once thought I would marry. Someone I damn near died over and he attacked me while I was still human. I can't do this anymore. I left the pack to prevent us all from fighting and look what it got me. Look at me Jake." I cried out. Jake put his arms around me and held me close but I couldn't stop crying. "I can't Jake. I will never feel right again. I can't believe this is what my life has become. I can't." I continued to sob as he hugged me.

* * *

I looked around my room and sighed. I couldn't believe I was moving out. I had boxes packed and everything but I couldn't believe I was leaving my home. To be fair it wasn't like I was moving across the country or even across town I was moving across the lawn to the mother in law house out back. Mom had, in between worrying about Seth and I being off rez and making sure Charlie stayed oblivious, fixed up the place and when we got home she showed it off and Jake was all over it. I played along, anything to keep his mind focused on being alpha and off sam, me quitting the pack, or saying goodbye to Bella. I was trying to be a good girlfriend, stepping out of my comfort zone to please him, keep him distracted from the other distractions. Moving in together wasn't even the worse thing happening to me. I had quit the pack but my body hadn't. I yearned to phase everyday even though I had spent the previous week pretty much in a permanent phase living outdoors and eating raw. I couldn't understand why my body just wouldn't let me take control for once. And furthermore if I couldn't stop phasing then how could my body ever start aging again? How could I get pregnant if it was even possible? I was afraid that the little glimmer of hope Jake gave me had been completely erased now. I sighed heavily turning around in my damn near empty room.

"It's weird." I heard a voice say from the doorway. I turned to see Seth towering in it.

I shook my head. "What's weird?" I asked.

He stepped in the room and gestured to it. "This… I have never seen this place empty. It's kind of freaking me out." He laughed. I did too and really took in what this meant. I had been so focused on making sure Jake was distracted I hadn't realized what a distraction I had become for myself.

"You think I'm doing the right thing, Seth? I mean with everything. Moving in with Jake and quitting the pack." I asked. I hardly ever asked Seth's advice on anything but the last couple months we had grown so close and he had matured a lot too.

"Lee, I remember when he damn near put you in a coma and seeing that to what I see now with you two it's crazy but I've never seen you smile so hard, laugh so loud, and it's obvious for everyone to see that you love him. After everything you've been put through this past two years no one deserves this more." He said gently. I probably looked like a deer in the headlights so he was tiptoeing around the subject.0

I kissed him softly on the cheek. "Thanks" I muttered.

"…and as for quitting the pack, well I'll believe it when I see it. I was there Leah and it killed me every day I didn't phase. There's going to be a time when we all can stop but it's not now. I mean if Jake's alpha then your alpha too or close to it. The elders see you guys as a team and they want the pack to look at you guys the same way." He explained.

I huffed in disappointment I was really hoping he was on my side when it came to this. "So what happens with Sam? I can't phase with him, I never want to share a mind with that-" My body started to shake so I started taking deep breaths and soon I was calm.

"Leah" I heard Jake call. I sighed heavily turning to the door where I knew he would be coming. He came in smile on his face as he looked at my empty room. He had accomplished his goal and it only took a couple weeks to get there, though those weeks were hands down the longest in my life. I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, you happy now." I folded my arms and said. He nodded and pulled me into him, nibbling at my neck.

"Extremely" he whispered. I heard Seth huffed so I pulled away.

"You know what get out of here. I need to start plan new things for my new room." He said and waved us off. I ignored him a little because I wasn't happy he was moving into my room but I couldn't say anything with Jake next to me and pulled Jake out the door and towards our new home.

As we walked out the house I started getting anxious. There was no more moving to do so this was it. I was making a very big and very public step with this and there was no going back. Thinking back at what Seth said earlier had me thinking about that day on the cliffs. How much had changed since then and how grateful I was that it had. I felt like I had matured so much since then gotten over pain that I thought I would take to my grave. I was truly happy and it was all because of him. I thought as I looked up to his smiling face. We got to our door and I took a deep breath. Jake laughed at my reaction as I reached for the door.

"Hold on" he says then bends down and picks me up. He opens the door as I laugh and put my arms around him. Almost as if he knew how big of a moment this was for us he took a deliberate step inside our new home and looked at me.

I couldn't help it because I was just thinking of how much had changed for us but I got a little too emotional for my liking causing concern on Jake's face. "No, I'm happy like really happy, Jake. I can't- I just can't express how I grateful I am that everything happened the way it did." I cried out. Jake put me down and wiped my tears. "I mean a couple months ago we were screaming at each other on that cliff and look at us now. We're living together. It's just crazy how things end up." I said and looked around. There were boxes everywhere but it felt like our place, it felt like home. "I love you so much." I said taking a deep breath. I was exasperated by all the crying I had done over the past couple of days.

* * *

**A/N: R+R ppl...last chp is next :-(**


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